bikechain

Copy Cat

2011-09-20T14:28:00.001-04:00

Munson Hills, doing her level best to run the BC black and orange!

Done

2011-09-18T21:00:00.003-04:00

I am done. Since no one else posts here, I might as well start my own blog. Peace fish grease.

Zak's New Bike

2011-09-06T18:36:00.002-04:00

What you talking about Zak?

Epiphany

2011-08-08T16:04:00.001-04:00

Kent called me early this year screaming, " You ready, you ready for an Ellsworth?" I like a chump, said "Yes". There was nothing wrong with my current ride, just time for some thing different. I am a sucker for "supporting the cause". Such a sucker, I have branded myself for life with the symbol of the crew. Kent was hounding me and I ordered a large Epiphany in black with black rockers and a black bling kit. I have a little OCD(Big Jim understands, we were separated at birth), so when Kent called me and said he should have it in a month, I was less than thrilled. Good news is that I had time to unload everything I owned on eBay so I could pay for this frame.

I got it with all my parts and after two rides, I couldn't get the seatpost to stop slipping. Most would be pissed, however shit happens and it was time to eat the shit sandwich. Made in America by hand, maybe my bike was made on a Monday morning or Friday afternoon. The biggest problem was they didn't have another large black Epiphany, so the waiting game begins again.

Ellsworth came through and I got my frame, they even sent a hydration pack to ease the pain. Everything went together without at hitch. I always figured suspension is suspension, and all this mumbo jumbo about VPP, DW Link, Horst Link and Snoop D O Double G was just another way for companies to try to market their bikes. Ellsworth uses the ICT, and I got 140mm of it.

I have to say...I dig this bike. I am not saying that because I bought one, I am saying it because this is my ideal bike. It sits right between a race bike and a trail bike. The ICT suspension feels like it is endless for a 140mm(5.5in) bike. I don't race, but I could with this bike. I could take it anywhere in the US and be just fine. By the way, it is about time for another NC trip Wrecking Ball and Big Jim. We just have to keep Big Squirm from getting his period again. There is a lot of beer in Asheville we didn't drink.

Just wanted to give Ellsworth and Zone 5(Kent) my approval for what it is worth. There is something to be said for "Made in America". Feels pretty good to buy American when I can, no matter what the wait is.

Zak "Little Ball" summed it up perfect. He named my bike Oprah, because it is big, black, and worth a lot of money. See you guys soon.

Thanks Kent.

Mmmmm......Mmmmm.......

2011-07-11T17:32:00.002-04:00

See Big Worm...cheeseburgers aint bad at all. Eat them up!!!!

Zone 5 Bike Purchase...I Think

2011-04-30T15:29:00.004-04:00

Rumor has it that my wheels have arrived and my frame is being assembled in Oregon. I need a fork and that is in the works. Hopefully if things pan out, I will be wearing a BC/Ellsworth kit while riding an Ellsworth.

I am a little sad to see the orange Turner on the chopping block. It is a great bike, an orange bike. The parts will be surfacing up on eBay next week. I would love to keep both but can't afford it. The new bike will fly under the radar with the black and white theme. No more "hey look at me, my frame and wheels are orange!"

If the owner/proprietor of Zone 5 can manage to get all parts in Tallahasse by May 15, I may come up to build the bike and help out with the Red Bug Challenge. My visits are always on the fence because I have about a million assholes' behavior dictating when I can have off. Worse comes to worse, I will have K-Dub, K-Swiss, Red Dragon, Butcher, whatever she is calling herself these days, send me the stuff and will build it in North Cuba.

If all goes well, I will be up there with 5.5 of ICT travel and a cross bike looking for clay again. Cross your fingers, I am due for a visit.

What is wrong with Big Jim?

2011-04-14T23:17:00.002-04:00

Nobody asked me (well some did) but Big Jim is creeping me out. With all of the chaos going on in the BC world we were relying on Big Jim to be the face of BC. He was doing a great job but lately he's been wavering. Maybe it was too many NB jokes? Or perhaps our hectic lives have him irritated? Maybe we should ride bikes more? Part of me thinks he's mad, another part thinks he's bike depressed, and yet another thinks he is wookin pa nub. MOST of me thinks he's like this picture on the left - smiling but you know he's thinking something else. The espresso is almost ready. Terry is back on the bike. I'm back on the bike. BRC is fast and new folks are hanging around the shop. RBC is on the horizon. What more could you want? It's time to come home Jim. Snap out of the funk or get snapped out of it. Dragon

Bike Chain Steps Up Again

2011-03-17T10:23:00.003-04:00

Quick Update: Just wanted to let folks know that Bike Chain is sponsoring the first round of the Georgia State Championship Series. Go here to register and find more information about the series. We'll be running a crew to every race and hope you can join us.

Dragon

Zone 5

2011-03-08T13:23:00.003-05:00

Wish I could be there for the first ride out of the new clubhouse. Good luck on the new venture.

Kent- Please get yourself a nice bike, you deserve it. The owner/operator of a bike shop/cafe'/clubhouse shouldn't be riding around on a do-do bike.

Does anybody post on here anymore?????

Big Worm's New Shoes

2011-01-31T15:30:00.002-05:00

Big Worm sent me a picture of his new road shoes, all I could think about was the similarity to Cousin Eddie.

Felasco 2011

2011-01-11T19:33:00.002-05:00

Well it started off way different than usual since some of the regulars did not show. Then, some who were still planning the trip could not go the night before. And, honestly, it really would not have been quite as fun anyway without the crew that had to bail anyway. For those that do not know: Felasco is usually a reunion of sorts for a large group of old school riding friends. We typically get dressed up (as in dressing silly - think halloween) and do a whole lot of drinking and bs'ing on Friday night.
Anyway, a few truck loads of us headed down day-of. Without too many problems, we got rolling at 8:50am. BJS and I got a one minute late start due to some Garmin difficulties. We caught up quick enough and rode with the crew for about what seems like 10 minutes before Iceberg had to stop to change a flat. Some of the slower crew crept on so we could catch up. After the 10 minute flat repair, we got rolling again. Then, after about 5 more minutes we erroneously followed the signs for the 62.5 mile option. (Read - we wanted to do the 62.5 miler instead of the 50 miler) At the fork in the trail, we went the way that said "62.5 miles this way". Well, it wasn't so simple. That section cut out about 10 miles of singletrack and traded it for about 5 miles of dirt roads. It turned out to be a shortcut with less fun riding conditions. Thats is where we all split up. BW said screw it and finished out his ride solo plus added on the extra at the end for a total of 55 miles or so. Derwood, Iceberg and myself tried to do a few extra loops before teaming up with SteveA to finish out the 50 at a moderate pace and getting in about 45 miles. Jim and Zak went all the way back to the source of the mistake and finished out the 50 for a total of 53 miles or so. I really and truly do not know how anyone elses ride went. I do know that my group waited over an hour at lunch for Jim and Zak before assuming they must have had a mechanical and were at the truck waiting for us. BW rolled in, tried to ignore us, and rolled out in quick form at lunch. We finally started setting pace for the parking lot, thinking everyone was waiting for us. Since we had Steve with us, we were backing off the throttle every once in awhile. He finally told us to cut the rope at the last sag. He wanted to be set free and said he would limp it in. We tore off and got back to nothing. No Jim. No Zak. No Chris. After an unknown long amount of time, Jim and Zak rolled in. Then after an enormous amount of time, Chris rolls in. We didn't know it, but hoss decided to go back and get all of that 62.5er. Due to our complete lack of organization, none of us knew what was going on. We (the main group) decided against 62.5 and just assumed that was the new consensus. After another 30 minutes of standing around we finally were able to go get our after ride lunch at Conestogos. Country fried steak as big as your face. It was good, the stories were good and no one would step up to the 3 pound burger challenge. All in all a few lessons were learned and I hope to remember them next year: 1. it was weird (and easier) to do Felasco while sober and not hungover 2. going fast is easier than going slow 3. 4 hours and 10 minutes of roll time should not cover a 7.5 hour span 4. Kent, Steve, Terry and Ron add a lot of laughter to the crew dynamics

Harden the F-Up, Rule #5

2011-01-03T17:39:00.004-05:00

This is my fishing buddy, Chris. He would definitely fit in with the Bikechain crew. He is Rule #5. This guy is going to get his head cut open for a third time due to a stubborn brain tumor and cyst. Imagine being sea-sick for two years on and off, I would have killed myself by now. The reason I bring this up is because I plan on using his and Wrecking Ball's situation as perspective this year. It makes me realize I have no reason to bitch, piss and moan, cry, or complain about anything.

I will miss riding Felasco this year, I will be at the hospital with fingers crossed for my buddy getting his coconut cracked again.

Anyway, see you guys on the next trip.....Tour de Tallasco?

The Chronicles of BC; 5000 more words

2010-12-20T15:23:00.000-05:00

The Chronicles of BC; 5000 words

2010-12-18T13:41:00.001-05:00

The Chronicles of BC; Revolutions Cyclery

2010-12-13T16:13:00.002-05:00

So, after the big race at Elijay where BC crushed Ace like 1978 El Camino center stage at a Monster Truck Jam came Revolutions. I can't give exact details as to the when and why. After being deflated at Elijay, I started concentrating more on beach volleyball, Sea Doos, beer and clubs - and less on racing. In other words I skipped on the scene for awhile. Of course, being family and all I was privy to the initial talks of the shop. BC, SM and Middle bro got together and started it up. Middle bro was the money man and kinda behind the scenes. BC and SM were the faces of the shop. They brought on a high school friend (of mine) that Kent knew a little about.
See, BC and SM were biscuits in high school together and BW and I were skater buddies in high school as well. So there was some crossover there. On a side note, BW had the equivalent of Kona Skate Park in his backyard in high school.
So anyway, BC and SM hired the best mechanic this side of Texas (and maybe the other side too). BW, SM and BC commenced to running Revolutions and setting the ground work for what would become the coolest bike shop in town. Not sure how many years Rev Mart was around, but apparently no amount of laughter can pay the bills forever. We knew things were rough when Jeff Gordon started hanging around the shop everyday. More stories on all that later.

The Chronicles of BC; pre-BC

2010-12-09T09:54:00.004-05:00

This is the parallel entry to apebike’s first installment of the chronicles of BC. To learn about the history of BC, you have to first know the history of Revolutions Cyclery. But, we can’t jump ahead too many chapters at a time so we will go back a little further.

Sometime in 1989, 007 was making so much money building houses that he had money to burn. So what did he do? He went and bought a “nice” mountain bike from Sears – A Lotus. At the same time, the trails at Munson Hills, Phipps and others were being ridden by some early adopters. All this was about the same time the St Marks trail was being built over some old Rail Road tracks. BC’s ‘rents were riding Jamis Boss cruisers and cophasing with the Shanks as well. BC was already helping a guy on the side of the St Marks trail (Larry) build bikes for sale to the locals. Imagine a school chair coupled to a hacked up road frame and you have a Woodville recumbent. Sooo, all of that added up to enough to finally get BC and his cuz on a MTB. I’m not sure which is a nicer bike – a Huffy or a Murray. Either way, we had one of each and we went riding. As is the case with everyone else, it was instant infatuation. BC quickly stepped up to a nicer Trek (850?). However, it was not as nice as the Spanish Mackerels’ same-paint-scheme Trek 950. Those early days consisted mostly of Cuz, BC, 007, The Mackerel, and the Middle bro on a Haro (One of BC’s older brothers, one of 007’s younger brothers). In addition, the Mackerel brought a couple guys in to the scene who would fancy themselves out on some rides with us. About this same time Big Worm was rocking the Michael Bolton surf shop hair and riding a nicer Specialized with custom NWA paint (in Daytona). He was hanging with the sophisticated and advanced local MTB crew. Apparently we weren’t high brow enough at that time to infiltrate the likes of Dave Baton, Zach, Snowman and such.

The following year(s) were spent swapping bikes, saving and spending money and getting mad skills. The first race team (for us) was started and we had a truck the size of my house for travel. We were K.Y.D.D, Racing. We were mostly spotted putting in our training miles at Munson and Leon Sinks. Leon Sinks was fun to ride and it stinks that it was shut down. The trails went down in the sink holes and some of the lines were impossible (for us) to ride. I can remember a time when I borrowed 007’s nice and relatively new Specialized. BC and I dropped in one sink hole at least half a dozen times and could never ride out of it. Every time we dropped in, we knew we were going to crash but we kept trying. The trails would also flood real bad in areas. We rode it one time in handlebar deep water and the bike almost floated.

My first race was a couple years later (1992?) in Ellijay, GA. Some of you know the place – M.O.E. Wow! Those guys had suspension forks and bikes that were clearly way better than mine. Not that I knew bikes well, but mine wasn’t nice. Sure, it had a remarkable paint job. It was teal green and painted with left over paint from my Camaro. It did at least have aluminum rims and a three piece crank (which was my benchmark up until that point). Of course I was a hard core racer so my (steel) handlebar was cut down to less than sixteen inches. My four finger brake levers were cut down to a nice, respectable three finger length. Well not only was my bike ill prepared for the race, but my fitness was too. There was one hill there that I could not ride in my middle ring, and I could hardly keep my balance in my granny. I would have said it was impossible to ride except for the fact that right at that exact moment in my thought process I was peppered with roost from one of those fancy suspension fork haverers. This was the famous race where BC beat Ace and he kept saying, for years… “, The last time we raced I kicked your ass.” I decided not to race but Ace, Jack Shank, 007 and BC all raced. I was repeatedly quoted as telling Jack “you don’t understand, I am not going to race”. They kept trying to talk me into it but I wouldn’t budge. Wish I would have though cause my first race was postponed four more years. Well, that was back in the day and at least 40 bikes ago.

Dirty Ron is on the Horizon

2010-11-20T22:00:00.003-05:00

The Dirty Ron is on the horizon. I have not been riding my bike. It is going to hurt. I think it will be good for the soul. Here is the plan....

Thursday- night ride on some Big Worm selected single track, then drink beer immediately.

Friday- get cyclocross bike ready with Big Worm built wheels, then drink beer immediately.

Saturday- The Dirty Ron is on. Beer drinking will commence immediately after.

Sunday- Old school Revolutions ride, but much slower. Beer drinking immediately after.

Monday- I leave and you guys stop drinking beer after your rides.

Jim Laugh (JL) vs. YAPL

2010-11-13T19:02:00.004-05:00

Interesting. We have always had a pecking order for who is the fastest on the bike. This has been great fun and another way for fake humbility - aka: sand bagging. The latest "sizing up" competition is who is funny and who is not. I'm so on tilt that it doesn't matter anymore (at least to me). I've been verbally brutalized as of late. Reminds me of the time I tried to be funny and Mark apologized on my behalf and said I was just in kid mode - affectionately dubbed "pee pee poo poo pants." I could always come back with some sort of bicycle accomplishment but those days/times seem to be a long time ago now. In my mind I've been here all along, but in reality I'm far removed from the cycling culture (which is not where I want to be). It reminds me of the time I made it back to cycling and Terry asked Chris "who's that loudmouthed new guy?" So it's time for a comeback from all the comebacks. Ronnie and I are in self-improving mode so I think I have at least one buddy. I've recently been called out - more so than in a long time. At this point I don't get to ride, I HAVE TO RIDE. Can you imagine Terry gets off his liquid plumber and kicks my ass on the bike? I will never live that down.

So... in an effort to spend more time with my friends AND ride my bike, I make it out to the Yet Another Steve ride on Thursday. Now maybe it was the two weeks of oxycodone and bed rest, maybe it was the lack of muscle memory OR maybe it was this little piggy went to Piggy's too many times, but the fastest 30 minutes in cycling blew to pieces at around 1 hour. On my excuses side of the brain my knee was hurting and I had crashed hard twice (once less than a minute into the ride). I had been feeling great on the ride but we had a quite a few start-stops. I do better when we without the stops. For some reason it takes me quite awhile to get the legs back after a stop. Hopefully it's just a lactic acid thing. And so it goes we had been at the bike wash - getting water bottle refills. Somebody questioned "lap of Tom Brown?" And of course we were off. It wasn't a face pace but for the second time on the ride my legs just went to noodles - barely capable of making forward progress. Jim was behind me talking as my mind was trying to command the pedals. He joked as to why there was such a gap between the group and us. My non-response and lack of speeding up indicated to him that I was indeed not joking. "Seriously?," he replied in a drawn out version of the word. He followed that with a new laugh. A soft laugh that you try to stop or stifle - the kind where you laugh and immediately know you should not be laughing. The kind where you have no way out of the laugh but to clear your throat or golf cough. He was dead silent. Not sure if he felt bad or was smiling ear to ear, but he had just invented the You Are Pathetic Laugh or YAPL. Feel free to sub in other words but just know Jim is the author. What was I to do? He had just verbally pants'd me and I had NOTHING left in the tank. It did not matter that nobody else was around. Rule # 5 kicked in and I hammered - at least for a few minutes. :) Drag on

Golf Laugh

2010-11-10T14:16:00.003-05:00

Believe it or not the Internet does have a definition for “golf laugh”. It states a golf laugh is “To offer a short, polite chuckle to someone as an acknowledgement that they said something THEY think is amusing, but it really isn't. To help someone not feel uncomfortable or embarrassed by politely laughing at their stupid joke.”

Suffices to say and considering the group of guys I hang with I golf laugh…… ALLOT. Aside from the Wrecking Ball and, occasionally, the Spanish Mackerel most of the BC guys just aren’t really that funny. Don’t get me wrong, they definitely believe they are. Perhaps it’s just me.

Other terms:
JL or Jim Laugh: Similar to golf laugh but instead of trying to be polite it has more of a “I am very uncomfortable with this line of joking around can you please stop now before I kill you” tone to it.

LOL or Laughing Out Loud: Often a term used by teenage girls…..or Lil’ Ball…..LOL

Good Day

2010-11-08T15:56:00.002-05:00

Went to Publix. Saw a great friend. Went for a "couldn't get the tires to break loose" two hour ride on my bike, the orange Turner is now officially off the chopping block, sorry Chris. Made a turkey sandwich. Had me two Oskar Blues Dale's Pale Ales. Two of those after a ride will make you buy a Park Truing Stand(always wanted one) and a Paul's Components cycling cap. Good day.

Back In The Saddle Again

2010-10-31T16:29:00.004-04:00

Working 70 hours a week doesn't leave much time for riding. It never fails, anytime I get any riding schedule, a crime wave occurs and I am screwed. Don't get me wrong, the overtime is nice, but I sacrifice any fitness I have, which ain't much.

I rode the cross bike today and did fifty, as a motivation/detox ride. Luckily they graded the rock roads to ensure that my taint was severely beat. It wasn't as bad as I thought, just kept thinking of Rule#5. I had a red tail hawk flying next to me for about a mile on the levee, guess he was looking for breakfast. Then around mile 30, I ran into a bunch of stinky black opportunists, turkey vultures. They stink and don't move, they kind of hop along the gravel and grunt. I think they were formulating a plan to eat me. Really pissed I could not get in on the Dirty Spagetti, once again due to other people acting like douches.

So here goes another effort to get skinny quick on the bikes, cross your fingers, I am back in the saddle again.

Videos as posted by Bigworm

2010-10-08T08:52:00.001-04:00

Here are some videos to watch for those of you (us) that can't go hang with everybody while he is here.

This is a five minute plus video of cycle ball. The sophisticated version of what we all used to do. Maybe we (read, y'all) should get a game together this weekend?? I can't tell you what the end of the video is like since it was way too long for me, but the beginning is neat.

Again, here is another long one. The first part is good. Makes me wish I wasn't scared to go big.

Kent, do you think you can get one of these built by this weekend? Still, shorter video but I didn't last.

Finally, a video made at the perfect length. I watched the whole thing. Wonder if MTB will get this type of technology one day?

Back to Reality

2010-10-05T18:14:00.001-04:00

This picture sums it up.

Ron, day 1 and 2 - Seriously? Good times

2010-10-01T21:24:00.002-04:00

Ron rolled into town yesterday and met the fellas at one of the local feed bags favored by Big Worm and Big Jim. I hate the place and their yum yum sauce. I showed up late because of work. By the time I walked in, the crew was done with lunch but still chewin the fat. J, Worm, Jim, Zak, Terry, Mark and Lil' were there. Out of smack-talk practice and late to the party, I took a verbal beating. I'd like to say I did so with grace but not really. Had a hard time coming down off of work - kinda like when you get home and just need 30 minutes to yourself to get right. By the time I was warmed up it was time to for everybody else to go. Ron and I had planned go ride but I needed to drop London's car off and run a few errands. He was pissed in a funny way and kept saying "seriously?" (because he had to chauffeur). I was close to shaking the work funk when we finally got to my house. A quick introduction to my disgusting dogs and some ride prep and we were off - headed to Silk and Cliff's singletrack. A stop at Mark's house, no ride cause you're daddy empathy and we headed down the power-lines. Got the new singletrack, east and west loops. Other than slinging beef and vurping garlic chicken, it was "as advertised". Talking and cranking jokes all along the way we made it back to my house 17 miles later. It was an awesome ride and by all accounts and all life segments I felt great.

Day 2 - Woke up and did some honey-dos. Had errands and a life-strategy session with cuz. Forgot my phone and felt too unplugged. Got back and found out we were rolling from Blairstone at 2. From yesterday we lost Mark, Lil, J and Terry, but we picked up Spanish Mackerel (aka Steve). Legs felt good considering I rode the day before. Odd because I haven't ridden two days in-a-row since Birmingham two years ago. This is where things started going horribly long. With a false sense of security I made my way to meet the boys. Mostly everybody was sporting the black and orange. I hang a u-ee and latch onto the back. As usual we are skipping along pretty quick on an allegedly "conversational ride." Everything is great. The weather is perfect, riding with the crew, on a dualie and I'm not working - in other words a hard situation to beat. Then the family truckster starts having problems. The wheels are wobbly, dents all up and down it and the tranny is making a noise - basically I'm starting to come apart. I can't get the salt out of my eyes, I'm breathing hard and having a hard time keeping pace - which I'm sure is not very fast. I keep trying to ride through it but not having much luck. After the ravine I try to sport a downhill and end up speed turning a corner - right off of the trail and crashing into the woods. Sucks. Shake that off and limp up to the group. Gathered by the bike wash, I fill my bottle and shove off to go check out the root hole. Everyone has stalled at some point of this technical downhill section. I'm following Steve as we pass the fellas and he's cleaning every little mini-section. Near the end just when I started celebrating in my mind - wham, bang, boom. Steve cleans the whole thing and I'm ass over head crashed. What followed during the next hour and a half was a long string of pedal suffering and more verbal abuse. I was defenseless in my weakened state.

I loved every minute of it.
K

Ron is in town

2010-09-30T21:11:00.004-04:00

Thinking about a BREW

2010-09-21T20:58:00.003-04:00

We don't usually go too far outside of the crew... but lately we've realized there are a bunch of people out there that look at bikechain.com and this blog. Lots of folks in Florida and elsewhere in the states and some from all around the world - that's pretty cool. As big as the world is it's easy to fall into the trap of self-glossing - that is to mean only being worried about shining yourself up for self-promotion. It's OK to have pride but sometimes you need to look around and give credit where due. For a number of reasons I've been thinking about BREW bikes and my facebook friend Steve Brewdude Garn. The guy is an awesome frame builder. The guy is a promotion machine and lately known more for his motorcycles. Best I can remember he cut his teeth on BMX bikes but the crew will remember him best for the 180 and 200 proof MTB frames we used to sell in the mid 90s. Many of these frames are still around and ride great. I've got a large 180 proof (Tim's) for sale if anyone is interested. The cool thing about the Brewdude is he is authentic. He is a tinkerer and magician with all things mechanical. Do your self and poke around on his web site some time - http://www.brewracingframes.com . You have to dig around for the really cool stuff but it's there and worth the price of admission. Look at the pictures of Ol' Rusty and google it - this bike (pictured above) is bad ass. The cool thing about BREW is they are still making new frames - check out the fixie stuff. The cool-est thing about BREW is that they will make anything for you or help you build your own stuff. A few of us have been seriously thinking about taking BREW's frame-building class. I personally been wanting to do this for many years. A few of us have built bikes before and welded many things - but the class is an entirely different level. I been needing a new 29er. Who's in for a January frame-building class?

K

Fat Tire Goodness

2010-09-15T11:12:00.002-04:00

The Florida Championship Series promoted by Gone Riding rolled into Tallahassee this past weekend. Ron hitched a ride up with Bob. Several of the BC crew kitted up to race. And lots of friends and family came up to hoot and holler. So many things went on that day it was truly a blur. I'll try to capture some of the day below with my thoughts but the main takeaway is that BC still lives and THANK YOU to all for showing support for the black and orange.

Tim is ripped (look at his arms). He had a bad day racing but still managed a 13th. I know he was poised to win but it was not in the cards. A little rest and he'll be good to go. Nancy was, as always, a lifesaver. Good to see some other Shanks there as well.

Steve is happy and I think it has a lot to do with Kristen. Kristen seems happy too. They both promise to start riding bikes.

My mom and dad made it out. Papa Benny helped out at the booth and worked the crowd. Grandma Shirley brought the Key lime cupcakes and my childhood favorite - chocolate-iced brownies. Case and Mia scarfed those goodies all day and it was nice having London there.

Big Jim had a self-described bad day. One way to look at it is he got a top 20 finish - there is always a bright side. Thanks for showing up tater salad.

Jason showed up big and nonchalantly dominated his class for his first win. His lap times looked real, real good. He's in the right class right now but the rest of BC needs to watch out if he gets ANY faster. Congrats on the win

Terry, Michelle and Cory were there all day. The Wrecking Ball was in good spirits and full of jokes and laughs. Thanks for the Sonny's sides.

Big Worm was another second wave rider claiming to have a bad day. For what it's worth HE rode the track and took home a fourth place so not really trying to hear much complaining. Thank HIM for lugging the charcoal and grill.

Darien flatted but was giving it a solid effort in the single speed class. D supplied the fruits and veggies. Julie brought the kids to cheer dad on.

Ken was pulling double duty - working the Tallahassee Mountain Bike Association magic and rooting on Colter in his junior race. Good race buddy. He had a solid 6th.

Zak? What can I say. He brought his girl for support and spun out the single speed to a solid 2nd place. Congrats. They both sported BC gear and Zak worked a FAMU lid.

I'm pretty sure Ron, Mark and myself had too many Fat Tire Amber Ales, but I know Lt. Dan did. At one point he was going to beat up me, Lyle, Darien and Ric (Lyle was not there).

Berg flexed and ran with the big dogs in the expert/pro class for an impressive 8th.

At different points in the day I spotted Libby, Cort, lil and host of other friends. I know I left something and someone out of this post but your presence and efforts are still appreciated.

It was good to have Ron in town.

Bottom line it was good food and good times.

DRAGON

Special thanks to Steve Andrews for supplying some of the photos. You can buy a picture of yourself on his site at http://www.andrewsphotogallery.com/Sports/Mountain-Biking/Florida-State-Series-2010/13746525_U5ZkC#1005390500_c3GBz BTW, congrats on winning your class Steve.

Red Faced Drama

2010-09-08T19:51:00.004-04:00

Hard to top Ron's last blog so I won't even try. I think re-living those thoughts has him home sick so he's making the seven hour trip up here to Tally Ho for the gone riding race this weekend. Not that he would race - he's bowed out of racing ever since Asbell crashed him out of that Tom Brown Race. It went down over by the shortcut entrance (behind the RC track). Ron was riding behind Jaysun. They were 1 and 2 coming out of the BMX track headed out for another lap. Jeff was trailing and wanted to pick up a place. So... he sprinted hard, cut underneath with not quiet enough room and caused Ron to high-side. It was an awesome sight and it was THAT much funnier because it was Ron - you know because he hates people. Ron is ACTUALLY headed up here for the good fun, good times, so you know we will have to throw down.

His recent announcement has opened a debate. Should Kent race or not? On one hand it's a 9:00 start for me, I need all the points I can get, I like to punish myself and racing is just plain fun. On the other hand the last time I rode was July 27 (except for Terry's Monday beat down) and am I really going to race the other cities? I know what I think and I think I know what you think. But... what it boils down to is team dynamics. Do you want me to race to the point of red-faced drama OR.. would the team benefit more from me working the BC booth? Need your votes and feedback ASAP so I can mentally prepare for my assigned role.

K

Thoughts on a 3.5 hour cross bike ride

2010-08-29T18:23:00.005-04:00

The old shop on Mahan, shop wiffle ball, Kent's denim overall stage, rubber Wal-mart boots to go with his overalls, Friday night Cabos, the dirty white girl at Subway, the Mike Fletcher yellow tire/ Kent Camelbak incident, Shitman, shaving Slaton's Michael Bolton cut off, glass showcase with all things anodized, the Barracuda bike movement, Tony's trials course, Brown Baggin', Chris harshing your new parts, Chick-fil-a nuggets, unboxing Costa's Indy frame, spider jumping, ball bearings for leaving your bike unattended, Benny and Jack Munson rides, tabouli out your ass salad, Sunday rides, messages if you missed Sunday rides, Kent ratcheting to China in Ellijay, Jaysun(RIP) nose diving his bike, campus BMX rides, Leech Center scenery, "Steve is out of the boat!", Mike Hossford!(RIP), Jaysun busting the window out with his ass while doing a Mike Hossford imitation(this one made me laugh out loud during my ride), Benny making you pick his bike up to verify that it was the lightest bike on the planet, riding to Tom Brown fireworks, Chicken touch my peepee from Hopkins, Winterfest parade double decker bike, Kent's conversion van(rape van by today's standards), lunches at the shop with the crew, night rides, the Books-A-Million death grip, I am a mad dog, and finally the dirty feet stripper.

Every time I ride, these thoughts pass through my brain. It was the best time of my life due to the people in it.

I think I was "living the dream", but didn't know it.

I got to spend more time up there...

Where's Gym?

2010-08-04T11:08:00.003-04:00

So, Big Jim Slade has been missing in action from crew rides for a few weeks, and people were starting to get worried. As Big Jim has been known to go missing for years at a stretch, There is some concern that we may have reached the next Ice Age. Have no fear, I called upon an old riding buddy, an icon of justice, and I assure you, he's doing his level best to find Gym.

Lions and Tigers and Bears! Oh My!

2010-07-26T13:07:00.006-04:00

I'm still not entirely sure this ride happened. I went to sleep Saturday night, in a fevered state of soreness and exhaustion, after Big Jim Slade suckered me into another ride where he drops the ever loving bejeezus outta me, and leaves me for dead. I whimper and shake until sleep comes fitfully.

I awake to my own home, but something feels different; can't quite put my finger on it, but it's different. I head to the kitchen as if driven by some innate knowledge that I need to fuel for a ride. Everyone is out of town, though. Except BJS, and he sucks, but is trying to atone for his sins at church this morning.

As I eat my peanut butter and waffle sandwiches, and giggle to the humor of Sweet Home Alabama (You've got a baby.....in a bar!), there comes a gentle knock at my door. Who could it be? Mister Rogers? Captain Kangaroo? Even better, my mythical, magical satyr buddy, Spanish Mackeral is dressed and ready, with cross bike at hand!

A text message later confirms another myth in the flesh, everyone's favorite unicorn, the Red Cotton Candy Butcher Dragon of Boot Camp fame, is in en route.

We rolled out easy, amidst a hazy morning of pixie dust and talking blue birds. The 3 of us made our way to the Ochlockonee River Wildlife Management Area, to seek lost trail.(Lost to us anyway!) I was so blown away by the sheer fairy tale nature of riding with these 2 white elephants(not a fat joke), that I kept expecting to round the corner and see Asland the Lion, and the Mad Hatter having tea, or maybe Lil' Ronnie with hair!

In our quest this day, we battled many an evil thorn, a vicious horde of blood letting, battle mosquitoes, and apparently one shark, as I had to stop and pull 2 of his teeth from my front tire. It was a glorious day of victory, for 3 guys getting their old school, core group, ride on!

(You'll have to forgive the blurry nature of the pics. I simply had to document this event, but apparently the Narnia filter was still engaged.)

Who knew Satyrs and Unicorns were such good friends!

You Cold Busted (The Rain)

2010-07-19T13:02:00.002-04:00

Rain, I hate you. Looking out my window lured me into a montage from the past. Check it out below. You gotta love the breakdown starting at 3:20. I should whip out the jammy and flat blast ya. A very gloomy Dragon

August 1, I will return to the Bicycle

2010-07-15T19:30:00.003-04:00

The last time I rode a bike was on a Sunday morning ride - when I supposed to meet the crew under the Blairstone flyover. Problem is I read Big Jim's Facebook post wrong and was a day late. Latched on to some old friends and rode out the Fern to Tom Brown. I felt really good on the bike. That is until I bailed to get some riding in (because they were to busy stopping and talking). Grooving the lower section I caught a glimpse of some Bike Chain orange and black. It was D from Guardian. He made me suffer on some of the climbs up the multi-use - and he was on a totally rigid single speed. Other than that I rode pretty good. A glimpse of me back in the saddle. Then the bottom fell out, I sold my bike, hurt my back and otherwise off the friend-grid. So my return to two wheels will be on Sunday, August 1st. Who's in?

Return of the Dragon

Twas the Night before... redemption (I hope)

2010-07-08T19:45:00.005-04:00

I hope this is not false... hope. I hope this nervousness I'm feeling is the good kind. A little on edge because the new boss starts tomorrow. Not because I'm not capable, but because I've lost the last six months to something I thought I wanted. Maybe I did, maybe I didn't. I just know I put everything I had into it and came up short. That feels bad. Double down that I was up for one of my dream jobs but came up short on that one as well. That feels double bad. This post isn't a request for sympathy, just an explanation of why I have been gone. With those dreams pushed further out of reach (at least for now) I've had to do some heavy thinking. Shut the door and sit in the dark thinking. I'm on the eve of starting a new chapter. A re-investment in the things I like and love - family, friends and bicycles. I'll come by soon and re-introduce myself. I'm sure I be on the receiving end of some well deserved shit. Just remember the harder you push on a weeble, the harder they wobble.

The Butcher

(RRP) - Racer Relocation Program

2010-07-03T21:33:00.002-04:00

In case you haven't heard, there is yet another new government agency out there. It is for the relocation of racers who cannot bear to show their face again, ever, because of poor performance. Apparently they are not allowed to call, write, email, blog, etc, etc. Word on the street is that 007's new location is known and its only 4 hours from here. Road trip anyone???

Where's Waldo?

2010-06-21T14:08:00.004-04:00

All of you know someone in this picture. Well, all of you should know someone in this picture. If you don't know someone in this pic, you don't count anyway. Ron, this is mostly for you - have fun. See if you can find him....or her

Red Bug Challenge - April 11th - warmer weather and better prizes

2010-03-30T10:18:00.003-04:00

This is a shout out to all MTB racers of the past, present and future. We're hosting the second annual Red Bug Challenge in Tallahassee on April 11. This is an awesome East Coast track with lots of fun and prizes. All the Tallahassee bike shops have stepped up to support the event. A portion of the funds will go to the Tallahassee Mountain Bike Association. So whether you have a 5-step rig or an old beater, break it out and come get you some.

Register or more info - http://redbugchallenge.com/

The Butcher

Santos trip

2010-03-17T07:58:00.003-04:00

So why haven't we been going to Santos more often? Its a 2.5 hour drive, and an easy day trip. We left at 8:30 and got back at 6 with plenty of riding in between. Its not like a race where you have to sit around and wait on all the waves to start or wait on prizes. You just show up and ride. Anyway, me, BJS, BW, Pizza Steve and Bump go get some. We start riding in the cow bone area first. It is pretty fun and somewhat similar to riding in Georgia. It was technical enough that you had to pay attention, but nothing crazy at all. PS and Bump were jumping stuff and making the most of the trail, I was just kinda sitting in, and BW and BJS were trying to find their groove. Bump was looking stellar, dropping folks and basically being the complete opposite of the last ride at TB park. The trails were great, but you could only get about thirty minutes of this stuff running front and back. So, then we head to the Vortex. On the way there is alot of Munson Hills type stuff. We start to notice something. Bump is now looking like the original Bump we knew. He is suffering. He has no legs for the fast stuff. So we all make the most of that weakness and press on. Vortex is a great trail with some rocky sections that you better be paying attention on. There are parts of that trail that could hurt you. So, based on my previous performance there, I am completely freaked out and let everyone go in front of me - including BJS. PS and Bump take off and drop everybody. BJS is completely panic stricken from everything that I keep telling him. Around every other corner I keep warning him of the impending gnarly section. Finally, the time comes, and he doesn't heed my warning. He tumbles down a rocky section and lands back first (knees to chest, feet to head) on a rock the size of your gear bag. He claims to be okay, but insists that I go in front of him now. I did, cause I think we would still be down there arguing about it had I not. From that point its smooth sailing out of there. I rode some technical stuff, took some tougher lines and cleaned everything so I was cool with that. Chris threw in a couple stunts so he was grinning ear to ear feeling proud to be a man. He did a ramp-to-rock up and over that was pretty impressive - for us wimps anyway. We then went to some of the jumps and drops and watched PS and Bump play. I showed off my drop that I hucked last time - Chris was impressed, and so was I. I would never try that again. It was stupid to try it the first time. We cruise on and start some more Munson Hills type stuff. I decide to take off and put a hurtin' on PS. Chris digs deep and puts some serious hurtin' on Bump - he just can't do the easy stuff.. All in all, some good riding was had. We quickly load up, go seek out the crappiest hamburgers we can find, get some beer and head out. It was a good trip. What are y'all doing this weekend??

Mirror, Mirror

2010-03-12T13:36:00.003-05:00

An article found on MSNBC.com states “Forget about opposites attracting. We like people who look like us, because they tend to have personalities similar to our own. And, a new study suggests, the longer we are with someone, the more similarities in appearance grow.”

Now I don’t know that I agree with this study, but I do know that if one more person mistakes me for the Red Dragon (a/k/a The Butcher) they may get a face full of my fist.

Now don’t get me wrong, I like me some Red Dragon, but other than the slimmest of resemblance we are nothing alike. For example:

-I ride my bike regularly = Seeing Red Dragon on a bike is like spotting Sasquatch in the Pacific NW;

-I like things neat and orderly = Red Dragon’s truck looks like a refuge dispenser;

-I’m quiet and reserved and don’t like to bring allot of attention to myself out in public = Red Dragon in a public place might be heard to say, in his most loud voice “do you remember that time I crapped my pants then threw my underwear at those nuns.”

So, the next time you see a guy riding his bike on the trail, his jersey neat and pressed, not making a sound……consider that maybe, just maybe, it is not the Red Dragon….It could be Sasquatch in disguise.

K90X

2010-03-04T13:37:00.003-05:00

Sure, most of you have heard about P90X, but how many know about K90X? Hmmmm? 4. Thats how many. I know cause it was invented today and there were 4 of us there. It was another re-invention by Kent (aka the butcher, etc, etc). The Butcher has laid down the claim that he will get in 50 rides in the next 90 days ('til Bump). Can you take the challenge? For some, it would mean cutting back on their riding to only get 50 rides in 90 days. For others ( like myself ) it is not possible. Are any of you borderliners willing to take the 90 day challenge? The Butcher says that if you follow his plan you too will be cuttin' and dicin' fools by summertime. Rides have to be over an hour to count with only two of your weekly rides being an hour. In fact, a better way to say it would be that you need at least 6 hours a week to count as 4 rides.

On a side note, watch out for 007. He is doing intervals so hard that throws up during them (and during the voice mail that he leaves me describing how hard they were). He is pretty confident about serving it up to all of you (Ric excluded)

Inspiration

2010-02-24T11:46:00.002-05:00

I needed some inspiration. I have not ridden with any frequency since Felasco. I am just now starting to recover from having my tooth kicked in by Jack Frost and Mark. Now that I think about it, maybe Mark is Jack Frost. You Tallahassee folks have plenty of inspiration to ride. You are fortunate enough to have an abusive crew to fuel the bike ride fire. I miss that abuse, it made me ride in rain, cold, and heat. I am jealous.

Through numerous eBay transactions and some financial trickery, I built a new ride. I will have to rely on "new bike fever" to get me off the couch, hope it works.

Winding Up

2010-02-19T11:48:00.003-05:00

The last few days have been really good on the MTB (minus the $140 lost for another broken part as a result of ANOTHER crash). Instead of us doing the same ol’ same ol’, we have started putting in some pretty good efforts during the last few rides. Last night’s ride was a blast. It was a small crew with me, Wrecking Ball, Big Worm and Lil Ball. Big Worm was a man possessed. He kept the pace up most of the ride and when he wasn’t attacking, Wrecking Ball was. Even though the efforts definitely hurt it sure felt good to put them in. Unfortunately, the cold weather combined with all of the heaving breathing has got my lungs all screwed up. I’m hacking and coughing like a 70 year old man with COPD. Maybe this little extra kick in everyone’s step is the first sign that Spring and longer days are just around the corner. I can only hope.

The only thing missing from the rides this week were the rest of the crew who were fairly consistent in the early part of fall/winter (Marko, Steve, Berg, and Tim). Sure would like to see those guys back out with us on a weekly basis. Those guys along with the lost boys (Dan, Kent, Ken, Darien, Rick) would make ALMOST everything right in the mountainbiking world.

Chain Gang - Captionater

2010-02-09T11:32:00.002-05:00

So, you want to be a part of the Chain Gang? Are you willing to wear the gang colors?

Kent?

2010-01-19T06:42:00.002-05:00

Where's Kent?

Jack Frost

2010-01-07T12:25:00.004-05:00

In English folklore, Jack Frost appears as an elfish creature who personifies crisp, cold, winter weather; a variant of Father Winter (also known as "Old Man Winter"). Some believe this representation originated in Germanic folklore specifically in the Anglo-Saxon and Norse winter customs^[1]^[2]^[3]^[4].

Tradition holds Jack Frost responsible for leaving frosty crystal patterns on windows on cold mornings (window frost or fern frost).

I had to find somebody responsible for this cold weather Felasco shit. I found him....Jack Frost. Now that I have personified the cold, I can be angry at it and hate it. I hate Jack Frost for what he is going to do to us on this 2010 Tour de Felasco.

I am going to get mean, really mean, like the beat up a fat kid and bitch slap your grandma kinda mean, down right nasty. I need some mean Bikechain crew members to fuel the hate heat for Saturday. Don't misunderstand me, we will still say thanks and hold the door for nice people on Friday night, however, if we come across that cold sprinkling fairy, Jack Frost, we are going to beat his ass.

R.I.P

2010-01-06T10:54:00.001-05:00

This picture goes out to brother Kent. No, he is not dead in the physical sense. Sure he’s “physically” out of shape and perhaps has hit rock bottom in the mountain biking sense, but he is still out there, somewhere, still kicking. We miss him on rides (some of the guys can actually remember what it was like to have him on a bike). There has been chatter about a comeback, perhaps him even winning the Georgia State Championship Series (although second place would be VERY respectable) in 2010. If you see him out there please pay your respects. Man I miss that guy.

This just in......

2010-01-04T20:28:00.002-05:00

Kent may or may not be doing Felasco. He will need your words of encouragement if he is going to make it. Or, alternatively, beat him up like he is accustom to. Today, the doc said it may be an infection and has put him on some antibiotics. If thats the case, he should be able to make it because he should be feeling better in a couple days. Either way, its probably going to be a very long 50 miles for the out-of-shape, recovering from a flu-like sickness, red dragon butcher. If he does go, I have him talked in to riding the Turner (I think), which means Steve will have a single speed to ride :)

New TV show - its a must see!!!

2010-01-03T19:37:00.003-05:00

Just saw an advertisement for a show on CBS. It sounds like it would be a great show. I can't wait to catch it sometime. Or, maybe just set up the DVR. All I really know about it is what you can infer from the title, but it sounds awesome. Go check it out - its called Everybody Hates Chris. How could you go wrong with a show like that - huh? Huh? Hmmmmm

A Broken Clock is Still Right Twice a Day

2010-01-02T13:13:00.003-05:00

More than 10 years ago I found myself at a New Year's eve party. It was at Tim's house. It was nicer than the usual parties I had been to before. Long Shanks isn't afraid to party, he was just doing it a little be classier than what we had been used to. Nice buffet spread on the dining room table. Music, games inside. Fire, grill and a bar outside. Two things stick out from that party. One, this one of my times my abrasiveness was really over the top. It reared it's head when you combined a youthful me, alcohol and the game Taboo. Imagine me laying on the Taboo buzzer with one hand while grabbing my crotch with other, topped off with me screaming get some of dat mother f*cker! All the while Brent's parents were in the same room mortified. I was quick to apologize which was even more quickly nullified by my next outburst - eat my *ss b*tc! I was hammered - It was awesome.

The other thing I remember even though I was deep into the liquor was the cigars. That was during Brent and Tim's cigar phase. As the clock struck 12 somebody busted out the stogies. Unfortunately, I decided to hot box the cigar. I used to love the sweet smell of a cigar. Now I'm drunk and this disgusting cigar film is in my clothes, nose, mouth and most certainly lungs. That was the least of my concern. I'd carry this film for a solid week. Not a great way to start the year.

This year (last year actually) I started early. I got my mind right and wrote down some things that are important to me. Things I believe I can accomplish in 2010. Even before that I've been doing some basic things like push ups and a little core work. That's my biggest issue at Felasco. I can ride 50 miles any day of the week, but my upper body will pay. In my mind I had some rides that I needed to hit this week. These were must do rides or I can't pull off Felasco. I spent NYE in bed shivering from fever. Did that on NYD in the morning but pain meds helped. Then we went to my parents for lunch. Champagne and push ups. If I can't get in a ride, I need to do something. The champagne wears off and I begin to shiver - again. I guess we won't make it to Tim's party. London drops me off at the house and I spend it holed up with meds and a dark room. Last night, here comes the elevated heart rate and shivers again. More meds and sleep. This morning I feel better but still a little off. By mid morning temp and shivers are again on the rise. Three days of temp can wear on you. I now know I'm defeated.

All these years later I now know I have this heavy film on me again. It's beauce I know I won't make it at Felasco. I'm out of time. Nobody to blame but myself. It is a little bit of buzz kill because I was up and looking forward to the new year. Looking forward to our annual trip. Getting back into the groove of hanging with guys and riding. Not just Felasco but making the Tuesday ride and getting Thursday lunch started back up. To top it off nobody believes it or cares that much but I'm in training for the GSC. Except me. I know that I'm good for it. But being wishy washy really is ammo to say same ole same ole. As always the proof will be in the pudding. I hear rumor that micro will be bailing at 25. That might be more agreeable. We'll have to look at it over the next couple of days. If everybody was going today I'd bail. We'll reassess tomorrow.

The Butcher

You Can't Start a Fire in the Rain

2010-01-01T09:14:00.002-05:00

Wow. You get older, you feel older. Massive neglect the last few years, especially last year has finally caught up to me. I arranged a play date for my bike seat and taint on Wednesday night. Turns out that was the least of my worries. The left knee was chirping from my one and only catastrophic hyper extension in my life. It was when Revolutions had a soccer team, the Revolutions Dogs. Streaking down the line at full speed, my knee fully extended the wrong way. I was out for the game and should have seen a doctor. But I was young and it was all good. It hurts now and then, but not enough to cut on it.

That knee chirping is drowned out by some unknown force plucking at my low back. The back of course was severely injured multiple times. It was back in the day when I would ride trials with Big Tony, Brent and Jaysun (RIP). Those rides and falls were the catalyst to my first introduction with a chiropractor. Bouwaiinnnn. Was that my back? No, just keep pedaling smooth. Bouwainnnn. The single notes keep playing for the first five miles and I'm thinking there is no way I'm doing Felasco.

At about mile six I start to meld back into the bike. I make an effort to relax. The only thing that is really bothering me now is the neck. Nothing I can do here but put time on the bike. I know it will hurt the next day and the next. One of those push through it things. The neck was originally injured bench pressing in high school. I was a little punk that couldn't hardly lift 135 pounds in the 11th grade. PE for football players was weights and football. Within about six weeks I was benching more than 200 pounds. I felt like a bad ass. But somewhere along the way I wrenched my neck. To this day it hurts if I am stressed - mentally or physically - which is to say it can hurt all the time.

So yesterday as the day went on I went into a rainy part of my head. The neck and trap area became more and more sore until I took some meds. I feel bad enough that I am sick. Cold in a hot house. No problem I think. It'll be good enough in the morning to ride. As I awoke this morning I discovered rain and a scratchy throat. That makes a little more sense. Sick I can deal with. I'm just a little run down. So... I still plan to put in my 20 today, double the mileage from Wednesday night. I need help though. It's raining in Tallahassee and in my head. Anybody got any flint?

Dragon

There's a cost to be the boss

2009-12-31T15:29:00.002-05:00

Alright, lets face it, we are all going to have to pay the price of doing Felasco with Kent. Kent is our friend and he has done so much for all of us over the years, we can't ditch him. So, paying the price is inevitable. Quick math looks like this, we will all be doing a 4 hour ride in about 5.5-6 hours. Kent will probably do it in 7-7.5 hours. Here is where the toll comes in to play. You can pay up front; pre pay if you will. Or, you can wait and pay after all of the accumulated intrerest, which of course is compounded by the mile. Below are the two payment options that I can think of.

1) On the way to the Waffle House in the morning, drop Kent off at the park so he can get started. That means probably driving about 7 minutes past the Waffle House to drop him off, then coming back to the Waffle House afterwards for breakfast. That should cost about 15 minutes worth of your time.

2) Start at the same time, wait for him on the trail as long as humanly possible, then go into survival mode and finsih the last 15 miles on your own. Get to the truck and sit, and wait, for an extra 1 hour or so. Then, finally, everybody go to Sonnys for some crappy BBQ.

What sounds better? Payment option 1, or 2?

2010 - a Kent Odyssey - class, you will be graded

2009-12-30T13:35:00.005-05:00

Boot Camp; Focus and Disciplined; 20, 20, 10; Red Dragon. All of these except Boot Camp were failures. It's hard thing to look back at your failures, especially since you want so badly to make a difference. It hurts even worse when you believe you were being more responsible when neglecting yourself. For those that know me you understand kids, bills, Pimlico, Pop Warner football, the storage shed, etc.... For those that don't "know" me I'm sure these just sound like excuses. On some levels they are. I'm just like everybody else, trying to balance life. In reflecting on this year, and nearing the end of my third decade, I came to some conclusions. While I try my hardest to do what I can making others happy, I am missing the most important person - me. Looking back on these blog posts I laugh at myself for whiffing at the plate after calling my shots like the Babe. So for 2010, I'm pulling the ultimate do-over. These are the things I plan to do. Add, edit or delete as you see necessary. As always, insults welcome.

Do the right things for my family

Continue Bike Chain and related companies

Listen more, talk less

Ride more, talk less

Eat and drink better, and do it slower

Promote three events in Tallahassee

Sponsor a third party race series

Re-enthuse the Florida Mountain Bike Association

Win the GSC

Spank at least 2 of the crew at BUMP - in a skirt

Buy a small car and keep it clean

In the great words of , well me, you are either a winner or a participant - and I don't plan on participating.

Kent

The day Florida (and we) was Frozen

2009-12-29T08:43:00.010-05:00

The coldest day in my life was January 11, 2004. Sure, I've been in colder weather. There was that time in the eighties when I was a kid. It was below 10 degrees and they had cancelled school. I was still sent to go get the newspaper in the morning. We lived in the woods and the driveway was dirt, twisty and a couple hundred yards long. I was in a t-shirt and no shoes. I wasn't out there long but it got cold quick. There was the time in the nineties in Colorado when we climbed up the monte cristo mountains (they're really called something else, but the name was close enough to nickname them after the Bennigans sandwich). Us mountain bikers hiked high, beyond the aspens, across a frozen-over creek and finally into a snow covered mountain top valley that had a lake. We skiid on our butts. Big Worm got pissed. His ankles were fried and we did not bring enough food. We were in shorts and pull over jackets, but we were exercising and the sun was out. It was cool but not cold. Last year I was able to go skiing in Breckenridge. Lot's of time on the Internet searching deals turned a $10,000 vacation into actual cost of $3,000 for a family of four (this included transportation). It was one of the best times of my life and want to ski again someday - maybe January of 2011. It was very cold with good snow. But the sun was out and, here's the biggest thing, we were dressed properly. It also helped we were staying on the slopes and could get warm at any time.

So it was we found ourselves getting dressed on an uncommonly cold morning in High Springs, Florida. It can be cold in the morning in Florida, especially in January. But the sun always promises to come out, and the temperature almost always rises above 50. Some of the years we've ridden the Tour de San Felasco it has even been warm, like 70 degrees warm. It's also been cold, albeit cold by Florida standards, so we know to layer. Watching the forecast on the relic of a TV at the ball scratch inn, we know it's going to be cold. So we begrudgingly suited up. Each of layering up as we always do. All of us expecting to shed some, maybe even most of this gear by lunch. We even went with head gear. Reminding ourselves you can always take it off.

We're late as usual and most of the 300 riders have started the Tour. It was cold in the hotel parking lot as we leave and even colder when we arrive at the frost covered parking area at the San Felasco State Preserve. We are all bitching about the cold but we still have that promise of warmth as the day goes on. The high was nearly in the sixties yesterday so it's not going to be that cold, right? We're all dicking around with our bikes and gear. The ground crunches under our feet as each of us goes through our own pre-ride rituals. I just want to get going cause I know riding will get us warmer. Especially when you get in the singletrack. Normally the woods are colder. There's no ambient heat to draw from, like from buildings, asphalt, etc... But on cold days like this singletrack can be your friend because there is no wind.

It's been five years now so the details are a little fuzzy. But I can tell you I mostly remember being very, very cold. When we started out the temperature was somewhere around 40 degrees (maybe a little colder). It never got warmer. In fact, this was one of those odd ball days where it actually gets colder as the day goes on. Compounding the cold is the lack of sun. Cloudy skies are topped off with wind. By the first check/feed station we're all complaining. As we get closer to lunch everybody starts talking about the soup I hate. They're also day-dreaming out loud about going to the car and warming up for awhile before tackling the second half of the Tour. I myself am in pain. The weather is not that bad by northern standards but for under dressed Florida boys it is very cold. We've been in the elements for about three hours and my feet are hurt the worst.

The idea of going to the heater sounds good. The cold has me feeling like somebody slipped a ruffie in my water bottle. I'm hallucinating about warmth. I have just enough of my bearings to know that if I go to the truck I'll never come back out. I'd be done for the day - not something I want on my riding resume. There is still some lobbying as we approach lunch. There is always sun at lunch, where you can usually see people spread out resting and eating. There's none of this today as people are huddled together, sipping soup and sniffling their pink noses. I don't care about any of this. I'm in survivor mode. I know what I'm looking for but I can't find it anywhere. Finally I break down to scavenger mode. I pull out my multi-tool and cut out two big sections of a used trash bag. These are the heavy duty thick and black variety so I think they will be a good substitute. I go find a place in the grass. I wipe off excess waste from the crappy soup and discarded half eaten PBandJs. I cut the heavy plastic some more and then I'm faced with a choice. At this point it's like removing a piece of wood or glass from an artery. You know it going to be worse but you have to do it at some point to fix the problem.

I finally work up the nerve to do it. I remove my shoes and touch my feet. They hurt to touch because they have that numb, tingly feeling. I wrap each foot in the plastic. I then force these frozen plastic burritos back into the shoes. They are a force fit but I'd rather have an uncomfortable fit if it means they can be a little warmer.

We saddle back up and complete the ride. I can't remember much else, other than being miserable. I do remember the thawing process back in the car. How it hurt but felt good at the same time. I remember thinking I'm never doing this Tour again. The official high and low for that day were 42 and 26. It was cold and miserable. I'm hoping for just miserable next week.

Dragon

Felasco = Dark, Tales of a 50 mile bike ride

2009-12-28T09:58:00.004-05:00

Nearly one year ago I was having a great time, save for some scratches on my neck. We were working on hour number two at the Tour de San Felasco. This is an annual bike ride pilgrimage to High Springs, Florida our crew has been making for nearly 10 years. We have a crew with varied skills and fitness levels so depending on who you are, the 50 mile off-road trek takes five to eight hours to complete. This year was no different in many ways, but it was different in many ways. I was ill-prepared as usual, but was having a great time. Leading up to the Tour I'd been commuting because my shitty Chevy Tahoe was broke down. This gave me a false sense of capability. At hour two it was all jokes for me. I was going slower than I wanted and even checking on other guys to make sure they were OK. With nearly 20 riders in our now trademark black and orange, there was ample space on the trail to move back in forth in the group. Some of our faster riders had checked out after the first check/feed station (about mile marker 12). That did not matter because I was having a blast.

My neck was already sore - not from riding though. It was from cloth burn where Micro ripped off the remaining bits of my shirt - part of my incredibly fat hulk costume. That was in the middle of a Target toy section. We were looking for green face paint to make my costume more realistic. Everybody had dressed up like an odd ball the day before for the drive down. As usual I had not prepared properly and had a pretty pitiful job of making a costume. It was, however, hilarious to look at our group dressed up like clowns at the Gainseville Ale House. Perhaps it was the beer, Micro's wrestling roots or a combination that provoked him to attack me in Target.

My plan was to eat and drink with minimal stopping. The plan was to NOT stop at lunch. That's the only thing I don't like about the Tour. For me, the soup is horrible. The only thing worse than the overly seasoned chicken noodle, is the indigestion in-a-bowl red colored concoction. For all I know it's chili or minestrone or veggie. Others rave about it. Whatever, I hate it.

All of these thoughts were going through my head. I did not know it then, but we ended up stopping at lunch. I had no way of knowing that I'd feel great a lunch. That I would spend time rushing Steve (aka Mac) and Swoell (aka Lyle) so we could keep the momentum up.The clock would be ticking for me - Steve and Lyle would have trouble too. This would be the best Tour yet, mostly because that added more single track. Unfortunately, that meant less double track. In the later miles double track becomes your friend because it travels faster than tight, twisty trails.

I had no way of knowing that in about four or so hours, I'd enter one of the darkest places ever. I'd learn that mile 40 and beyond are not good for me. I would later discover my suspicions were correct. That Tour organizers ran some of the sections backwards, and that the one big switch back climb would be later in the ride. For me, it would end up being excruciating. Leg burning induced hatred. No longer would I be able to joke. I'd be unable to complete a sentence without some form of the word f#ck. I ended up so deep in the hate cave that I would not come out for more than a month.

This year I'm slower, fatter and the last time I rode a bike was November 8th. Added this year are a few extra layers. My back is injured and I'm riding a 29er rigid single speed. Bring it on.

Seventeen Days and a Wake-Up

2009-12-22T16:11:00.006-05:00

In seventeen days, we will be walking to the Waffle House in the dark. Wondering what to eat? How much do I eat? I wonder if I ate too much? Did I eat enough? Did I ride enough? Should I have ridden more? Base miles? More dirt than pavement? Single speed? How much beer did I drink? Why does my head hurt? Why is Kent wearing a ladies Eeyore night shirt from a gas station?

I have come to the realization..... screw it.

This one is about seeing friends, drinking beer with them, walking the line of being arrested for disorderly conduct, and laughing to the point where you forget about all the responsibilities and life events that kept you from riding since the last Felasco.

This one is going to be good.

Rusted Root and Last Chance Fancy

2009-12-09T10:11:00.003-05:00

Few thought it was possible for the Chehaw Champion to fall this far from grace. The Dragon has become a joke that is no longer funny any more. We're at the uncomfortable stage where it's awkward to make jokes because they're ringing more than true. The Incredibly Fat Hulk is even fatter this year. A disgrace. Next year is my last year in Vet (30-39). Awareness of these bike geek milestones makes you start filling your iPod with anthems like Last Chance Fancy. Then you get all weirded out and have to turn it all manly - yea that's right I'm a rare breed - I SHOULD be a bad ass like the Last of the Mohicans bad asses. Get some bitches.

But alas I'll probably just do yard work and the closest thing I'll come to riding is coaching Pop Warner in BIKE brand shorts. The gauntlets have turned rusty and we're all out of motivational videos. I got nothing for you but results. Let's see where I am on Jan. 9, Mar. 21 and June 5.

Send Me On My Way.

What Was I Thinking...

2009-12-07T16:08:00.004-05:00

I took it for a ride today after three months of waiting. It was eye opening. You never appreciate suspension until you don't have it. Got an hour in to workout the bugs and there weren't many. The only surgery was cutting the front brakeline. It was good overall. I have to learn how to ride again. The rigid bike took me back to the days of mountain biking with t-shirts and toe clips, and Oakley Razor Blades in neon colors were cool.

This will be my ride for Felasco. I have five weeks to get my shit together. I have done more training for the beer drinking than the ride itself lately. I only have two Fat Tire Ales left, so training will officially start after this blog. I threw the singlespeed rigid gauntlet down and am going to stick to it. I am shooting for 50 miles and will make the game day decision on the extra miles. What is it, 64? If I complete that, I might be so excited, that I punch BigWorm in his man-pleaser(mouth). I could go on, but I am officially unable to operate a motor vehicle. So I will end with a call out.

Come on fuckers! Felasco on a singlespeed, cause misery love company. In all seriousness, can't wait to see and ride with you douchebags.

Water Bottle Contest - Please Weigh In

2009-12-03T09:51:00.004-05:00

Howdy. This is the last round of artwork we had from the last time we were working on water bottles. Please weigh in and let us know what you think and/or how it should be edited.

Dragon

Out of Pocket - My bad fellas

2009-11-25T12:36:00.003-05:00

Sup fellas. I wanted to apologize for being out of touch. On top of some turbulent times in a variety of segments of my life, I had one of the worst back episodes ever. Major suffering. Can't lay down type pain. I begged for some pain killers, got em and they helped. Pretty much zonked me out though. Anyway, let me know if I rubbed you raw. BTW, bring on the innuendos.

Dragon.

PS - Happy Birthday Mackerel.

This weekend was like an out of order four course meal

2009-11-16T20:32:00.004-05:00

As the title states, this weekend was like an out of order four course meal.

The entree' came first. It was a small, but great ride. I met Jim, Chris and Steve for a little east side mtb'ing. After they were tired from trail maintence, I went and threw down some washed up expert beatin' on 'em. Helping my unexplainable urge to ride hard was the fact that I was on a full suspension bike - with gears. Something I haven't done in awhile. Man, you can really go fast with a big ring.

Then, I cleansed my palate with a nugget of a challenge. The boys (Jim and Steve) talked me into doing the Turkey Trot (5k, not the 10k version). It wasn't hard to do. A few minutes later at the after ride lunch at Tijuana Flats, Zak was comitted too.

Next up was the cheese and crackers. On the drive home I reflected back to the last time I ran 3 miles. It was with Dan over a year ago. The time before that was with RC, probably two years ago. On both occasions I was incredibly miserable and way out of shape. My problem ankle was, well, a problem. I started to think I had made a bad decision to do this run. So, off to test the waters I go. I put in about 25 minutes of running (at least three miles I hope). No real significant pain; probably due to the Mona Vie Active that I drink :)

I cleanse my palate again. This time, between courses, I opt for the hunching over the kitchen counter while trying to warm a bottle of milk and not pass out from oxygen debt maneuver. Success.

Then came the appetizer. Well it was like an entree' but there was not enough food to be considered an entree', so it was an appetizer. The wife and I had another date night. After a trip to Target, we headed to Tapas for some overpriced, ill portioned food. I have to admit, though, the food and ambiance was great. Because we got to Tapas so early, we had the whole place to ourselves. No one else. I can't remember what we had, but it came on large rectangular plates and the water was served in tall skinny glasses. Its a pretty cool place. Kinda like Mozaics and that other place I used to hate on Monroe Street. Not much bang for the buck, but definitely good food, good times.

The salad came in the form of reading through the ride emails for Sunday plans. I laughed out loud (thats LOL to some of you) when I saw Dariens emails. Saturday night he was this tough, single, care free cyclist ready to go ride. The only thing standing in his way of a four hour cross ride was getting the address for where the ride was starting. Then, come Sunday morning, he is daddy pee pee poo poo pants and not only is he not going to be riding that day - he probably won't even step outside of his own house.

Finally, dessert. We didn't get to select it, as in "by choice", but boy was it good. The 'ole lady and I were on a walk with the dogs and the baby. We were heading back from an ABC loop, walking by Bagel Bagel when we saw Steve ride by on his road bike. As he looped around to come greet us, he had the not so brilliant idea of trying to be cool. He came, full bore, rear wheel locked up slinging it out powerslide right up to our feet - on his road bike. For a second, maybe even two, Cortney and I both thought that he looked cool as ice. Now, that is someone with some skill. Some may try that on a MTB in the dirt, but rarely does anyone have the nuts to try to pull that on pavement on a road bike. Now I know why. Boom, boom, pow. Steve don't got no style.... Not only did he crash, AND flat, but he also shredded his rear tubular. The good news is that we had plenty of time to catch up with Steve on the long walk home.

ramblings about getting older with a little about bikes

2009-11-10T08:43:00.004-05:00

Another birthday in the books. This blog's title pays homage to my years - 38. Friday was actually my birthday, but it was a pretty awful day. The only saving grace is it was bracketed by time with my wife and kids. Cards and hugs and kisses in the morning, then on to a small present and impromptu visit to a high school football game in the evening (Casey and Mia had a blast). I had a good time as well and it was funny to check out a real life Friday Night Lights.

Saturday was not much better because I had to work. Mia begged to go on the morning's first run so that was nice. On to work while the rest of my family spent time with extend family in town for Justin's wedding. On to my cousin-in-law's wedding at Goodwood. Very nice affair. It's still a small world and I bumped in to my man Bob with AB. He opened the door to talk about 180 Energy so obliged. I stepped through it and next year's sponsorship looks promising. Not a done deal but it looks good. I asked one of my other cousin-in-laws - Cord - if he'd been riding any (we sold him a Caloi back in the day). He played the question down but said he brought his bike. The beer had been flowing so I'm like ",dude we got to ride in the morning. I'm talking early!" Much to my horror he said yes.

So we're rolling by 7:15 at Tom Brown on Sunday morning. No BS, I feel great. I ask him want he wants to do and mentions he's heard of Cadillac. So I alter our course and lead him through part of Tom Brown, Cadillac, Piney Z and then the lollipop loop. We hit all the cool sections and loved every minute. Fitness level wise everything felt great. The only time I ever felt dead legged was climbing up the sissy route from the dike. We get back a little early and decide to hit some more singletrack at Tom Brown. It was one of the best rides I've been on in a very long time. Back at home I burn the next 8 hours renovating the kitchen.

Woke up yesterday and it was back to the grind. I was dead tired. Beat. I was starting to get grumpy. Then I did some thinking. What I've found is we all can fall in to the trap of focusing on the negative. That is what I was trying to do. In what was an otherwise aggravating set of circumstance and a not-so-great birthday weekend - there were some pockets of positive times, and some truly great times. So that's the focus now - positive.

Dragon

The Lost Boys

2009-11-03T13:20:00.003-05:00

Wow, what a fun weekend of mountain biking. Saturday had me, Big Worm, Wrecking Ball and Spanish Mackerel loading up the truck and heading to middle Georgia for some mountain biking fun.

First stop was the Boy Scout camp (Camp Thunder) near Thomaston. With well over 2,000 feet of climbing per lap, past trips on this trail have turned out to be more hiking than biking, but this time it seemed to be the opposite. It’s amazing what you can do when you settle down and just find a grove. Big Worm decided to do things the hard way. About 2 miles in, and during the second climb, he breaks a rear derailleur. So now he’s down to about 3 gears. This is not the place to limit your gear choices. Riding behind the big man you would never have known he had a problem. He rode all the climbs the rest of us made and cleaned some that we couldn’t. The Mackerel gave his best impression of a mountain goat while running his mouth during the climbs. Me and WB were devising a plan to toss him over a cliff while at the same time breathing through our eyelids.

After the ride we head for Macon and try to find the big man a derailleur from one of the bike shops. After several calls it was not looking good as none had any level of Sram for purchase. As luck would have it, one of the wrenches offered to sale his XO off of his personal bike…..SOLD. So we get to the shop at closing time and the deal was done. Oh, and it must be said that Big Worm was “recognized” in the shop as a GSC participant. I made sure they realized that he was not only a participant but the GSC Clydesdale champion.

After checking into the Hotel, getting cleaned up, and drinking a few beers, we head out for some Mexican food. Good stuff, and hey since we are not racing the next day (thank God) why not hit Baskin Robbins for some ice cream. Seemed like a good idea at the time. Back at the hotel there was mention of a ten o’clock run to Five Guys Burgers but, thankfully, cooler heads prevailed.

Sunday we get up early and hit the free hotel breakfast before loading up the truck. Before heading to Dausset we hit Dunkin Donuts for some iced coffee and donuts (did I mention not a race weekend…THANK GOD). Off to Dausset we go. Unlike the day before, Sunday was gorgeous (sunny and cooler). The trails were a mess due to all of the rain days before. Very slick, and very muddy which made things interesting. Not even half way through the ride Big Worm, you guessed it, breaks another part. This time his saddle rails have snapped. He gives it a go for a while but decides he needs to head back to the truck. He hands SM the map, gives a few instructions and we part ways. Me, WB, and SM hit the “huff and puff” section of Dausset and struggle with the mud and water. WB was about to blow a gasket (bonked) and I’m having some “intestinal” issues (which I’m sure had nothing to do with the diet I enjoyed while on the trip). Overall another very fun ride.

Load up the truck, stop by JB’s BBQ, then head to the house. I can’t wait for the next guy’s weekend (RACING NOT INCLUDED).

Rotten Meat May Change My Life

2009-10-30T08:56:00.004-04:00

Wow. I've never been smelly but recent events had me sniff-checking everything. It's no secret the Tahoe is a wreck. I'm OCD but have to combat that with being a complete slob. If I keep it clean then I HAVE to keep it clean. So I let it be a complete mess. That all may have to change. I did a prelim clean the other day throwing away the big chunks and putting the rest in piles. There's the front seat, back floorboard and cargo area. I'm feeling pretty good about myself - Rome wasn't built in a day right? Right about the time Silk was looking for his vest I noticed a little funk. Could it be the socks, shoes or helmet from Sunday? How about the krispy kreme box from Friday? Or maybe the near empty chocolate milk containers? Milk can get get funky. Forget it - let's wait a day or two and see (or smell) what happens. Unfortunately this morning set off an olfactory alarm of gagging proportions. On par with a triple-gagger diaper changing. Wife and kids were waving goodbye as I opened the car door so I had to choke down some puke, pull out of the driveway and roll down the windows as I left neighborhood. Gasping for air I cussed it aggravation. Aggravated because I'm frustrated with how nasty I am. Aggravated because something is in the Tahoe and I've got to find it. So I put the sniffer to work. Ran through the usual suspects. Mild funk but nothing a stick-up couldn't handle. Check under the front seats. Check the cargo area. Nothing. On to the back seats. Driver side - nothing. Passenger side door opens - dry heave. Damn, that's where the Publix pork roast went. I was all pissed at the bag boy for shorting me and it was MY fault. I had clearly shoved the shopping bag under the back seat when loading my groceries because there was nowhere else to put it. More cussing because I now know I am a piece of crap. So happy Friday to me. I am now committed to re-inventing myself, again. I'll embrace the OCD and clean it up. Washing and checking here I come. I'll try to snap some pictures of the Tahoe detox.

Dragon

Weekend Recap

2009-10-26T12:37:00.002-04:00

Got in some miles this weekend. I met up with the crew both days for some fun riding. I jumped in on both rides, so I didn't get as many miles as they did. I guess I probably got in around 50 miles between the two days, based on them claiming 65 miles. I rode the Lynskey both days and had a blast with it. It needs some work now (more on that later) so it may sit on a hook for awhile until I get a chance to get to it.

Saturday had us riding east. Its been awhile since I have been on a group ride, so it was a surprise to see how mean everyone was to each other. They have either gotten more t0-the-bone with their insults, or I have gotten weak. We headed out with a pretty steady pace to do TB, Cadillac, the bucket loop and a whole lot of grass field riding. Tyler stepped up and took charge of leading the ride; which was awesome. However, we logged in a fair amount of miles on what felt like riding on a wet mattress; uphill; with a headwind; brakes dragging, etc etc. On the way back, we really lifted the pace for awhile on upper Cadillac. That was fun to see how the 29er felt at speed. When we got to Piney Z park, we found a camelbak that appeared to have fallen off of someones trunk as it was just sitting in the parking lot unattended. We went to take a look to see if we could find some identifying objects and we stumbled upon a newish looking Blackberry. Great! Now we definitely have the obligation of trying to find the rightful owner. I texted the two most recent contacts in her message list. She (the Blackberry owner) had been staying in close contact with "Kate" and "Nathan" since midnight and had been recently texting Kate. I let them know that we found the phone but we never heard back from them. While we were waiting on a return text, Juancho and the Big Ring Circus showed up for a couple jokes. They hurried along as they HATE to be seen on the trail with, or even near, us. I think its just bad for their rep. Before we left, Chris made the executive decision to call "mommie" and let her know that we had found her daughters bag and phone and that we were leaving it at the bathroom at PZ park. The gang had mixed emotions about that being a good idea, but we let it slide. Sure would like to know how that all panned out. Anyway, we road on, shared a few more words with the BRC and started to go our separate ways. I heard it was another TT back to Joes.

Sunday was north. I met the boys on the powerline and we headed out for some Red Bug, Phipps, Secret ST, Overstreet. We had the dragon with us this time and we were relentless on dragging him around for his Felasco prep. There were a couple of "sprints" on the otherwise tame ride. Some new routes were laid out by BW. On the way back from the lake, through a particularly technical section of flat dirt road, I grabbed Chris' handlebar just in time for him to tackle me. Seriously, we went down faster than you could say "big man falling". Not even close to the first time I have crashed with Chris, and probably not the last. We got back rolling quickly after some laughs of some of the witnesses and headed for Secret ST, Everything seemed fine, but I noticed later that my front rotor was very warped. (I did have to straighten my bars and brake levers after the crash) After getting home I realized my brakes were really dragging and it was hard to push the bike. Its possible that the rear wheel slipped in the dropouts. I haven't had a chance to look at it yet though. I know I have to work on the fork too, so it may sit idle for awhile.

I summary, I got 50 miles in this weekend, which makes a total of about 60 for the past six weeks. I had a blast riding with the gang and am super motivated to get back out again.

Now I get it!

2009-10-22T09:24:00.003-04:00

Now I see that all the breeders are full of it. I was always curious if it really was true. The breeders will tell you that having a baby is a must-do and you will never be able to find as much joy as a baby. Maybe. Maybe not. I think that what is more likely is that they want to see you go down in a huge ball of flames. That will bring them joy. Unfortunately for me, most of my crew already has kids and I have zero victims-to-be on the back burner. Luckily, I have brought joy into my friends lives by wallering in the grips of misery for the past six weeks; but they are are liars and I hate them all for the truths they have sheltered. A quick run down of some of the crew will show that I don't have anyone to bring me joy in the way others have had with me. I don't have anyone to point and laugh at (except for Darien, but thats too close to my own misery. that will most likely be a simultaneous laugh and cry). Some of the guys are too young, some are too old, and only two are possible candidates. So, be sure not to let Steve or Tyler in on any knowledge of any of the misery of fatherhood. In the meantime I will have to decide whether to take the high road, or be deceitful / unscrupulous / unconscionable and join the ranks of the lying majority.
As far as bikes go, here we go. I have my wheels finally and the Lynskey is getting built today. I plan to meet the guys for Thursday lunch. I plan to watch a one time showing of a cycling "movie" tonight with the chain gang. So, yeh, I am on a come back and actually plan to get on a bicycle one day real soon.

Congrats Bike Chain

2009-10-19T14:09:00.006-04:00

Way to go Bike Chain!

From the racers to the cheerleading section, the chain gang was in full effect this weekend. It definitely makes the racing much more fun to have the whole family out there in attendance.

Gotta give all the racers due credit; each rider brought something to the table. Tim, jeeeesh, what a breakthrough performance. Expert podium, not much more to say, that was awesome. Ric, prolly not what he would have liked under normal circumstances. However, to have been sick (in the lungs too), make a game day decision to race, and not have been run off from the soflo bullies - that was very impressive to pull off a 3rd place with mad consistent lap times. Its crazy to think that 3rd place in expert is a dissappointing finish for you. Zak finished a race!!! And got 3rd place in expert lite (singlespeed). He looked solid on the first two laps, leading some of it, until a couple crashes and a wall got in his way. Way to gut it out to 3rd. David won in sport class and made it look easy with expert lap times (very consistent too). Tyler did his first race, and won!! On a fully rigid bike by the way. Terry trained so much in the past three weeks that he caught and passed Steve (who beat him at the last race). Maybe Terry gets the most improved medal?? And then Steve, who showed up at like 10 or 10:30 wasn't even going to race. He finally got talked in to racing (luckily, he just so happened to have his bike and all necessary race gear :)) and raced with style - enjoying a quesadilla from Tijuana Flats while coming through for his last lap. I'm not sure how Colter and Jason did, but I know Colter was never going to race again at his last race; but he did. And jason seemed to be pretty happy with his race and more happy that it was over....

You guys be sure to go by Tijuana Flats and let them know how good the food was and that we all appreciate their support.

If the phone doesn't ring, its me not calling

2009-10-15T21:08:00.003-04:00

Well, FSC #3 at our local trail is coming up this weekend and I won't be racing. For those of you who have raised children before will understand and my excuse can be shortened to just a few words (I have a 5 week old girl). For those of who have never had the pleasure, I don't think you will ever understand the level of pain until you do get the chance to care for a newborn baby. It is not as simple as saying that you get robbed of sleep. It is day in and day out of pure sleep deprived misery. You get to sleep at intervals of 1-2hours at a time with 1-2 hours awake time between. If you are like Darien, no problem, you just go back to sleep. If you are like me, that basically means you don't ever get back to sleep after your first 1-2 hour "nap". Have you ever had a couple of bad nights of sleep in a row?? Yeh, try 40 days in a row so far. So, to say I feel like crap is an understatement. I tried to do round #2 and realized that was a mistake. And, that was three weeks ago, I am way worse off now. In the past 5 weeks, I should have gotten in around 50 hours of riding with structure, to include approximately 30 rides, 10 runs, 20 days in the gym. Hmmm, not quite. I've gotten in three bike rides to total about 2.5 hours, 2 runs that equal about a mile if added together, and 100 pushups (50 on two different days). So anyway, I am not racing. Not because I have a problem not winning, but because my body and my schedule will not allow for recovery if I were to attempt to race.

But enough about me. It is beginning to sound like everyone is backing out?? We drive out of town all the time to race and now we can't even race out of our own back door? Ric, sick. Jim, sick. Ken, Sick. Terry, not sure but he seems down that everyone else is backing out. Tyler is doing first timer and going full rigid to give his competitors a fighting chance. Chris? He was motivated to help provide on-trail protection for Ric in case those clowns tried to jump him. David will race, but he will be all decked out in his endurancefactor gear. Steve and Tim???? Darien, you better race now while you can. Zak HAS to race cause he has a new bike to show off. Kent. ( I figure that was enough said about that). Anyone else gonna race? Come on we gotta represent. It all about flying your colors. What gang are you with?

A man’s got to know his limitations!

2009-10-01T09:29:00.003-04:00

A good size group of Bikechain’s posse made the trip to Fernandina Beach this past weekend for the second installment of the Florida State Championship MTB Series. Me, Big Worm, Wrecking Ball and Spanish Mackerel loaded up the truck on Saturday and headed over. Derwood with his liter, Red Dragon with the Ball and Chain, and Iceberg with his parental/sibling units also made the drive over Saturday. Marko and Silk got up before the chickens on Sunday morning and headed over in time to make the race.

Saturday’s pre-ride was uneventful. This course is fun to ride. Nothing real technical, but fast and flowy. You can lose your head on this course if you’re not careful (literally). There are quite a few low hanging limbs waiting to take your head off if you are not paying attention. Not a big deal on pre-ride but be careful on race day when oxygen deficit is maxed out. Load the truck back up, head to the hotel, get cleaned up then go find grub. Hmmm, ate at a really good Italian restaurant there last year so we hit it again. Good food, good times. Argue about what each of us owe, stress about it a little more until Big Worm starts to explode then head back to the hotel for some R&R. Watch a little Police Women of Broward County to look for lil Ronnie (Big Worm says he wears skirts and rides like a girl so he might be featured on the show). Get ready for sleep before a tap on the door. Bikechain’s CEO decides to make a late night sales call pimping the new Bike Chain gear. Swag and monies exchange hands and finally get rid of CEO. Lights out.

Six thirty came early. Big Worm did his usual jump right out of bed, head for the door and hit breakfast. The big man worries that he will not get his 5 waffles if he is not first to breakfast. Terry is on the big man’s heels. Me and Mackerel take a while to get motivated enough to get up. I am in my typical race day panic mode questioning why in the hell I put myself through the stress and aggravation that comes with racing. I can’t bring myself to eat much on race day due to nerves, but manage to swallow a bagel and banana. Off we go.

Yellow wave goes first. I’m in my second ever Sport race and about to soil myself on the starting line. Horrible start. I KNOW everyone is faster than me so I go into the woods near dead last. Crashed 2.5 times in the first lap. Needless to say, this is not going well. Get behind a few guys not going very fast and just sit there knowing I should get around. About get head taken off while trying to let Mr. Amazing Pro Dude (Bob) around. Three laps and cross the finish line in 20th place (out of 27 riders). Did I give it all I had NO, was I disappointed YES. If I can’t get these pre-race panic attacks in order then my racing days may be numbered. I’m pretty good at handing out water bottles. Maybe there’s a place for me as the MTB version of a domestique.

Congrats to Iceberg (1st); Big Worm (3rd) and Silk (4th) on their podium finishes. Great job to the Red Dragon and Bikechain for being the round sponsor . Tom Brown in two weeks. Trying to get my wife to get us out of town that weekend but no luck as of yet. Damn I may have to enter ANOTHER race. Do I feel lucky, well do I, punk.

Sound the Charge!!

2009-09-24T09:00:00.005-04:00

By my count, we've got 9 Chain Gangers rolling to Fernandina, Saturday, for the 2nd round of the Florida State Championship Series. I know of at least 2 more showing up Sunday morning.

Personally, I've been tired from the race travel, but a couple of months off does wonders for, or to, the psyche. This race was on my "schedule, so I could race my 29er at least once, and with my sketchy ankle, not too many courses are agreeable. This one is flat, fast, and not too rough, so here goes.

Next thing I know, BikeChain is a round sponsor. Let's hear it for K-Dub's vision, or madness! Either way, you gotta back your brother's play. Chain Gangers en masse. They're coming out of the woodwork for this one. Human Wrecking Ball is on his 15th racer reincarnation. We can rebuild him. He will will be stronger. He will be faster. He may blow sky high, but the tales afterward will be enthusiastic and entertaining! Longshanks will be expanding his views from the inside of the expert torture chamber. Silk will be debuting his latest Frankenbike. Spanish Mackerel heard the trumpets calling from his place in the clouds, and will drift earthward for a weekend with the boys. Clearly, Big Jim Slade has not had enough to fret about since the GA Series, so he's jumped on board. Even New Baby Daddy, Marcus, is looking to participate in the race foolishness. It's probably a lot easier than the new baby madness that's been his reality, lately. Derwood has started threatening us with his RV racermobile. If we go over in that rig...God help us! No, really! I mean God help us. I'd like to actually arrive, and a little divine influence could go a long way.

If you find yourself along the North Florida Atlantic Coast this weekend, and there are a bunch of hyped up, lycra clad, mountain bike kooks buzzing the beach line, look around for the BikeChain tent. Stop by and say hello, but beware, if you get a little madness on you, we are not responsible.

Fine Print: BikeChain madness may stain. You may be able to get it out with seltzer water, but I wouldn't know because I don't believe in froo froo stuff like seltzer water. You may find you like the stain, and that's ok. It's not like it's some sort of social stigma. Well, actually it is, but we kind of like social stigmas around here, so embrace it. If the stain is left too long, you may find yourself suffering side effects. Side effects may include: leg shaving, lycra wearing, mud splashing, bike part cravings, possible divorce due to inordinate amounts of riding time on weekends when you should be mowing the grass, planning your vacations around the 50 mile race you read about in Dahlonega, and having entirely too much fun with a bunch of two wheeled misfits who enjoy the same BikeChain, stain driven, side effects. Not so bad, huh? You may have noticed that anal leakage was nowhere in that list. Now you're gettin' it!

Everybody gotta have a dream

2009-09-01T08:35:00.004-04:00

So I've been in my own personal Siberia. I'm no different than any other fool out there. By all accounts I have a perfect life. An American life - A job, wife, kids, two dogs and BBQ on the weekends. I look at the kids homework, do odd jobs around the house and sling my own version of TPS reports at work. Let's just say that I'm invested in the family. That is great but I got this devil on my shoulder driving me to be more, whispering pipe-dreams of stand up comedy fame, real estate tycoon status and bicycle parts liquidator warehouse Internet mogul thingie. I feel guilty for wanting more. I don't need more things. But I do need more achievement. I can't shut the brain down. Meanwhile I'm either losing it or really inspired by a morality play that shouldn't inspire - but it does. Terrance Howard's DJay character has caught my attention with his proclamational song "It ain't over me." The movie is Hustle and Flow from 2005. It's a tough watch because the guy is a scum bag pimp and drug dealer, but yet you can't help from being drawn to the character. I'm guessing I like it because DJay climbs from one of the worst places you can imagine to implied success. I think I'll ride my bike today.

Red Dragon

From the Weekend

2009-08-24T18:52:00.003-04:00

Great ride on Sunday. Unfortuantely the numbers twindled as the ride went on. A little weird that out of 5 guys I'm the only one with hair on his legs.

The End

2009-08-11T12:09:00.008-04:00

Ok, so let’s rap this thing up. On Saturday Me, Big Worm, Ice Berg, and Graham Cracker piled in the truck and made the long drive to Helen for the last of the Georgia State Championship series. Big Worm and I had participated in most of the series races with Ice Berg and Cracker just tagging along. Longshanks and his wife headed up on Thursday to make a long weekend of it.

I was so stoked that this was the last race in the series and I can promise you it will be the last series I commit to.

The trip up was fairly uneventful. We made the usual stop at the sausage place so Worm could get his fix. We were pretty happy once we finally made it into Helen, only to find out that place stays crowed with tourists all year long. It took us 30 minutes to get through town before we could make our way to Unicoi for our pre-ride.

The trails at Unicoi are awesome. Nothing real technical and the trails were in great shape. Plenty of climbing but all were doable. The descents were fun (even though I loved my brakes on most of them – I’ve got to work on this weakness). Berg and Cracker did their thing while the Worm and I decided a slower pace would be more appropriate for a pre-ride.

When we get back to the truck I see foot doc at the parking lot. Foot doc was only 2 points behind me in the series points (me in second and him in third). He notifies me that he will not be racing the next day due to an injury he sustained in the Ellijay race. Sucks for him, but my race just got easier. The fourth place guy was 4 points back so he should not be a problem.

A walk in the oven (it was hot), some mediocre food (but good beer) and we are back at the hotel for an early night of it. Sunday morning comes and we are off to Unicoi. We find a good park, set up the tent and Worm and I get ready for the early wave start. Thank God for this. It was brutally hot and we knew the second wave guys would be suffering.

I’m not quite as terrified as I usually am before a race but the butterflies were still there. Worm is off and I am awaiting my start. Small group this race as only 9 guys show up. We’re off and I am second going into the woods behind “evil bastard.” Of course the race starts going uphill and then a sharp switchback. EB hits the deck while trying to negotiate the switchback. I get around and am leading the race. Roadie dude is on my wheel and stays there for a while before he decides to get around. He’s gone. By that time EB finds my wheel. He stays there for most of the .lap. We start discussing politics and the state of the current health care system before he realizes I can’t climb worth a damn so he gets around and he’s gone. I keep a steady pace and start picking guys off from the other groups. I’m starting to think that a third place finish would be respectful and this way I am assured of my number 2 series placing. Every now and then I can spot roadie dude in front of me but never really could bridge the gap. I’m tired of climbing and my heart rate is way up. I’m ready to be done. I pop out of the woods, think “thank God” and start to make the 75-100 trek to the finish line. I look back to see who’s behind me and thought I saw a guy in my class. I amp it up then look back again. The guys not coming (he ended up not being in my class). I look up and notice roadie dude right there. The kick in the balls for this race is that the last 30 fee or so is straight up. I kid you not that sport guys were walking up this thing. Well luckily for me roadie guy did not know I was coming until it was too late. I was in the perfect gear and he was not. I stomped it out, caught him, and beat him to the line by about a foot or two. I was stoked to have stolen second place.

Big Worm finished up and got his first place finish. Who cares that he was the only guy racing in his class.

Graham Cracker destroyed his field. This kid flew. I know because he flew by me during my race. What’s amazing is that he hit something that stung him on the mouth about 10 minutes into his race. His mouth swelled up like a life raft.

Berg being the amazing racer that he is (if you don’t believe me just ask him) destroyed his field as well.

Longshanks in his first expert race suffered. Three laps and a hot day made the conditions tough. It still looks like he had a respectful finish. I sure wish I had your toughness LS.

We hit the series ending awards ceremony where BW and I collect our plaque and swag, jump in the truck and head back home. I’m in the door about midnight, announce to the wife that amazing his home, show off the swag and hit the bed.

Georgia series in the books.

Hitting the Wall

2009-07-22T08:03:00.004-04:00

Me and Longshanks made the long drive to Ellijay over the weekend for the 7th installment of the Georgia State MTB Championship Series. The Event was held at “Falling Waters” which is a planned gated community on 2,000 acres. The place was beautiful with a lodge, giant lake and great views of the mountains in the distance. We pull in around 2:00 on Saturday for our pre-ride. The temperature was a cool 77 degrees (are you kidding me, it’s July).

We gear up and hit the course. The start takes you 1.5 miles up a paved road. Two minutes into the ride, I’m in my small chainring and small cog and my heart rate is at 90% max. This road was steep and painful. This is a pre-ride and I’m working too hard. Fifteen minutes later we made it to the top of the climb and finally hit some doubletrack. You get a chance to recover a little before hitting some little false flats. About the time you have recovered from the road climb they give you a nice little doublletrack climb. LS powers up but again I am in small/small and just about hitting max heart rate. I make it to the top, stop, and try to get my breath. Damn that little hill hurt. Finally, some downhill that you can flow. Then, suddenly, I see 3 arrows all pointing down (the sign of danger ahead). What came next was the scariest downhill I have ever ridden. This thing had washouts, ruts a few rocks and headed straight down. You dared not let go of the breaks. The few times I did let go I could not believe how fast the speed built up. LS was just ahead of me and about half way down this 2 mile or so decent when he hit the ground. I swerve as not to run over his skull. We stop and wonder what the weird smell is. We soon realize that our brakes are smoking. We get back on the bikes and finish the decent. The rest of the ride is easy. Some hiking trails and then pop out into a field that has some small climbs. 5.5 miles and 44 minutes later and were done with the pre-ride.

I knew Sunday would be tough. I am no climber and am at least 10 pounds heavier than I should be. My legs felt heavy from the previous days efforts and I’m dreading doing the road climb (twice). LS has the early race and takes off. He comes through both laps in 3rd place. The first two guys (sandbaggers) have left the rest of the field behind. LS finishes in third but he is a little disappointed in his race.

I have the second wave so I’m off around 11:40. Eleven guys in my class and we are headed up the road climb. I feel like everyone in my class has passed me going up. I catch and pass most before the singletrack. I believe I was in the woods in 4th place. Unfortunately I have a mechanical and have to get off the bike to fix it when two guys pass me. I jump back on and catch those two. I get to the doubletrack climb and end up walking half of it. Bomb the downhill and get ready for the next lap. At the start of number 2 I knew I was in 3rd place. NB checked out early but I had my eye on the 2nd place guy. He stayed in my sight all of the lap but I could never get right up on him to get a chance to sprint it out at the end. I finish 3rd about 30 second behind 2nd place guy.

Considering how I felt going up the climbs, I guess I should feel good about the 3rd place finish, but truly I do not feel that I am riding very good lately. Most of my issues appear to be more mental than physical. One more race to go in the series which is Helen in 3 weeks. I’m holding onto 2nd place overall with the 3rd place guy on my heels only 2 points behind. I’ll need to pay close attention to him in Helen.

So what did the two older guys learn while traveling alone to a MTB race? Pinot Noir goes best with cheese and crackers when served at room temperature.

GSC Race report

2009-07-08T10:59:00.004-04:00

Well, I finally got ON the podium in expert. Not in the grass next to it, but ON it. 2nd place behind A.J., I'll take that. Some haters may argue that there was a low turnout, but I still beat out alot of fast guys in my class, and others as well. When I compare my past finishes and times to this past race, it is clear that I have made improvements over the rest of the feild. Not sure what it was; I mean I am really confused by it. It can only be one of two things: Mona Vie, or I am well rested. Maybe it is a combo of all the hard work I put in earlier in the season, with alot of rest lately. (by rest, I mean 3 hard 1.25 hour rides a week, with an occasional group ride thrown in and 3-5 gym visits per week) I have had no time to ride on most recent weekends. Hmmm, maybe everyone is just getting slower. Whatever, I gots my medal and I made all the boys stand around and wait for me to collect my paycheck baby!

So the trip itself was cool. That area of GA has this crazy lake that looks like a morph of a lake and a river. Lake Oconee I think. There seemed to be more boats in the water than people. It was insane. All the while during our pre-ride, we kept hearing the laughs and screams from nearby boats. The smell and sound of the outboards finally broke us down and we all decided to sell our bikes and get some boats. Yes, SOME. The plan is for BW to get a ski boat, bikediet gets the pontoon boat and BJS gets a cabin boat. The Mack already has a center console boat. We are going to do our best to not be complete losers anymore. So, if this all pans out I will need a new handle for blogging and bikechain.com won't really make sense in the boat world. boatnutrition just doesn't sound right. But, bikechain.com could turn into boatmotor.com - its got legs...

As far as the rest of the racing crew: BW got first place in Clydes and will most likely be the GSC series champion. He mainly just has to show up at the last race and collect his riches. BJS was a little less than pleased with his performance (still in the wood) and may be looking at 2nd overall in the GSC series. I think everyone needs to quit picking on BJS cause his mental game is lowing him down. So the next time you feel like cracking a joke, just praise him instead - will work wonders. The Mack raced to a thrid place finish, HOWEVER, due to a butterfly distraction 100 yards from the finish line, two guys got around him and pushed him back to fifth. Still, a very good finish considering his sickness for the previous week.

All in all, another good trip with the boys. Good food, good times.

Somewhere over the rainbow

2009-07-01T09:48:00.003-04:00

Tomorrow marks the second anniversary of the now infamous "lips on my belly" comment. Here's how the story goes.... So we are at cuz's little sister's b-day party. This is the fist time London and myself had been on a date in awhile. It was also the first time we honestly realized we were getting to be a part of the older crowd. London and I got there first which in recent years in itself has become an anomaly. We go to the bar and I start working on my favorite drink. London looks great because we've dressed in our best, hippest, going out clothes. We're feeling right. Then the pretty people show up. An assortment of Abecrombie and Fitch models, all pre-med, show up like they've just spilled out of a limo and walked the red carpet. We fight through the imaginary paparazzi to our hibachi table. London and I sit on the edge. All is going well and I'm behaving for the most part. Introductions, kikoman flipping an egg in his hat, a few drinks and everybody is feeling right. By the time dude is making an onion volcano, everybody is loose and we are starting to fit in, sort of. Then the conversation shifts to everybody going out. I think the birthday girl wants to dance. I puff my chest out proclaiming I can dance. Birthday girl laughs. Inner-redneck man appears and does his best E.F. Hutton. The table talk and laughter came to a screeching halt as I say "shit I can dance, I can do all the dances. I'll jump up on this table and dance. I'll do it with lips on my belly." They all looked perplexed. Mark looked at me like he was mortified, like he was actually embarrassed. Like he was saying WTF and meant it. I wanted to explain but thought better of it as London whispered something about being embarrassed. A few seconds later, that felt like forever, Mark finally broke the deafening silence by erupting with laughter. Not because what I said was funny, but because all of their friends found out I was freak in less than a dinner.

Cheers,

I have no self control

2009-06-26T13:37:00.003-04:00

So I'll admit it. I don't know how to suffer anymore. I've made some good choices along the way. But then we were sort of out of food. No big deal, make my self a sandwich. Get to work, put it it the fridge. Forget that it's there, OR maybe I make myself forget it's there because I don't want anther crappy turkey sandwich. I roll to Publix because I love it there. As I make my way to the salad cooler, I'm mesmerized by the rhythmic sound of spatulas on the grille top. I snap my head to see dude working up a Philly. Damn, in one short sigh I knew I'd be cheating. I wanted it even more because dude was taking forever after I ordered mine. I was trying to act all cool looking for a place to stand and ended up pacing back and forth. Finally it's wrapped and I'm off. Ate half of it in the parking lot. Ate a quarter of it driving back to work. Feeling pretty crappy now, but not bad enough to throw away this Hersey bar.

Loser

Holla back ya'll!

2009-06-24T11:25:00.006-04:00

Feeling a little tired? Drink a 180. Anybody out there thirsty? As we near the mid way point of the year, it's time we put together a report for our sponsors, small and large. I need to get some images for the report/video. I'll be circulating a few thumb drives to get video and picture files from all you BC crewers. Unless you can burn them to a disk. Anyway, let me know if you can help me out...

Dragon

slice like a ninja, cut like a razor blade

2009-06-19T07:51:00.004-04:00

In a last ditch effort to rebuild myself I have exiled to Siberia. I'm more like a lurker until July 4. I've realized I've got to do what I do to make myself happy. There's a dichotomy here. I am happy eating whatachickin's with mustard, onions and jalapenos. I'm happy pounding Cokes and Extreme Sour Patch Kids. But... I'm not happy with the subsequent Incredibly Fat Hulk body. I'm healthy but I'm not healthy. For the first time in a long time this is more about the end result than it is about the gauntlet. Besides Ric and Mark are in the stratosphere, Jim and Tim are not too far behind, Neck is caterwauling, Ken has old school hand, Five-O rides like 200 miles a week, Steve likes waxing that ass (same with the rest of the BC crew like Zak, Berg, Micro, Lt. Dan and so on...) and the Worm, well the Worm will never race again after the Georgia series . No longer does Clark Kent have an evil nemesis. No longer does the Red Dragon need to make claims of this and that. This is me alone on a frozen tundra working it out. No promises but I hope to come back healthier.

K Dub

Less talking, more doing

2009-06-16T06:50:00.003-04:00

BUMP Report

2009-06-04T15:15:00.001-04:00

I was hoping that one of our more “colorful” characters would give you a race report. I guess you’ll have to settle for my poorly written chain of events.

Another BUMP and Grind is in the books. This was my third installment. Last year’s BUMP was my first race back in about 9 years (I was on hiatus). Couldn’t have gone much better at that time. This year was a much different story as I “BUMPed” up to Sport class.

Bikechain/bikeposse brought a large contingent to Pelham (a/k/a Birmingham). Big Worm; Spanish Mackerel; Red Dragon; Longshanks; Derwood; Silk; Mingo, including Mingo Jr.; and 007 all made the trip.

My truck consisted of BW; SM; and RD. AC/DC may have may have sang it but I got to live it (highway to hell). RD and SM in the back seat of a vehicle must be what it’s like to have two misbehaved 7 year old children. My head is still ringing from all the goings on. Also, the truck still has a strange odor about it. May take some time to air out.

The true BUMP experience began when my truck pulled into the parking lot to see 007 in a cute little skirt. You see 007 lost a bet at last year’s BUMP and was settling up. You got to give the guy his props. I’m pretty sure I would have reneged on that bet. So we gear up and head out for the preride. Nothing like a little 16 mile ride to get the legs feeling fresh for a race the next morning (joke).

Next stop, bike shop so BW can hunt for a XXXXXLLLL size jersey he eyed on the trail earlier in the day. No such luck as apparently only scrawny ass people buy from that bike shop (discrimination). Hotel for a quick shower; Olive Garden for a good meal, then back to the hotel for very little sleep. Who here knew RD could make trumpet sounds from his ass at 4:00 in the morning (me either…until now).

Sunday rolls around and I am a mess. This is not unusual for me on race day, but this day topped them all. When we lined up it took all I had to hold the bike upright. It was not looking good for me. In the woods almost dead last. Took a while for me to settle down and get in a good rhythm. Unfortunately, I found myself content in my placing which explains my poor 15th place finish. Oh well, hopefully another lesson learned.

Silk did his normal thing, won…Tim did his thing…podium…Berg had a very respectable 5th place…Mingo appeared to have rode well. The rest of the guys can comment on their own race.

That’s it for now. Oh, except for BW and SM trying to wreck us on I-10 in sight of home. But that’s another story.

My neck... my back, my silky smooth crack

2009-05-27T09:25:00.004-04:00

So there was a time when I was doing bike trials in Big Tony and Jaysun's backyard - which happened to be owned by Ken at the time. It was great. Brent and I would go over there with a couple of 40s and try to ride through the maze of skinny boards, tall wooden spools and other hateful obstacles. The maze wove in and out of trees and pretty much covered the yard. With the beer flowing, industrial work lights on and music blaring, it was a recipe for oneupmanship. I bet you cant do this, I bet you want do that - you get the drill. So we'd ride for hours with brakes chattering from the roofing tar on our rims (awesome braking power). I loved it. Then one night something clicked - in a bad way. In my early to mid 20s, I found myself barely able to walk and having to go to a series of doctors just to be able to sleep, let alone walk. I've never been cut on but I know that type of pain. That's because I am very familiar with it. It took four of five times of this type of episode for me to give up trials. That still bums me out. This pain is exacerbated by my neck. Trying to keep up with my brothers in high school, I jacked my neck up bench pressing way to much weight. I feel that every day.

But... Spanish mackerel will tell you I'm full of shit. Anybody that has these types of pains will tell you "it only hurts when I do this". I can remember being on the shop floor with a full bag of party ice bellyaching during the day, then at night grinding on some chic on the beer garden dance floor at Bullwinkle's. I mean just working it. We were all tore up and Steve looked over and gave me the "I don't ever want to hear about your back again" speech. We all hurt. But Bump and Grind only happens once a year. Everybody is going this year and my brother is wearing a skirt - his punishment for the slowest lap time last year. He's wearing it in a bid to pass it off to me - the odds on favorite for slowest lap this year. Saturday night will not only feature good food and good times, it is when you pick up your time slot (you get to negotiate your time bonus). What I'm trying to say is get in the truck bitch. All together now - let's pile on HWB so that he makes the trip.

Dragon

Sunday Morning Ride on a Monday Afternoon

2009-05-26T10:00:00.003-04:00

Well that was fun. Nice little ride on a Monday afternoon felt easy like a Sunday morning. Most of the fellas were there but some were missed. The worm and Big Jim were on stupid bikes. The rest of us were rollin on dualies. Chris neglected to tell everyone that he had to put in two hard hours. So when we got to the Fern, he pretty much hammered everybody. Chill on Goose Pond then hammer on both sections of Cadillac and the bucket loop. I hate him now and my legs hate him. It's weird how all the different personalities, ages, ride styles and fitness levels seemed to click. It was a very cool ride.

Dragon

WTF, where is everybody?

2009-05-21T07:57:00.002-04:00

So I'm totally bummed. We need to get the band back together. When are we going to have a regular Sunday ride again? When are we going to have a lunch on Thursday again? All the lurkers in the house say yaya!

K sizzle

I LIKES ME SOME...

2009-05-14T14:03:00.001-04:00

TCBY (large cup of chocolate/strawberry mix)

Fig Newton’s on a road trip with the fellas

Beer after a particularly hard day at the office

Red Wine after a particularly hard day at the office

Good singletrack with very few sharp corners

Road biking on a road with very few sharp corners

Bikechain.com/bikeposse

Time away with Mrs. Slade

Market Diner in Thomasville

F150

Jimmy Durante and Dean Martin

Epic Saturday

2009-05-11T09:20:00.003-04:00

Steve having a happy (gay) moment

The fellas

lil' Ronnie leading the way

Suns out guns out

Another happy (gay) moment

Tired

2009-05-07T08:14:00.001-04:00

A year and a half ago, before I started riding bikes again, I was a fat sorry mess. My weight was over 200lbs and I felt like crap every day. My typical day consisted of: getting up going to work; eating a BIG meal at lunch; go home; eat a snack/drink a coke (maybe a beer); cook BIG dinner then eat it (while watching biggest loser) while sitting in my lazy boy; another snack before bed (mmmm Oreos and milk); sleep. I was so out of shape that I’d get winded walking from the house to the mailbox. A doctor’s visit put a little fear into me when he started talking about high cholesterol and chances of diabetes. It was time to get motivated so I started running then eventually riding bikes again.

So now I’ve lost a little weight (need to lose more), and get plenty of cardio. Funny thing is….I’M STILL TIRED. Granted, this is a different kind of tired. Me and the boys did intervals on the mountain bikes last night. They (the intervals) were particularly brutal this time. I’m not one of those people who ever had a need to puke during or after a workout, but last night was about as close as I’ve ever come. Silk and Marko swear that these things will make us faster, and they better be right (intervals = no fun). It was good to have Spanish Mackeral and Brother Kent join me and Marko for the painfest.

Tonight is the “Joe’s” ride. A special appearance by lil’ Ronnie visiting from North Cuba will make the ride extra fun. Don’t know if my legs have much pep in ‘em, but I’m looking forward to the ride.

Wish I could go back home and crawl into bed and take a long nap instead of sitting in an office all day. Oh yea, in case I didn’t mention it…..I’m freakin TIRED!

Peace and Love Baby

2009-05-05T15:30:00.002-04:00

This blog has been missing something the last few days, PEACE AND LOVE.

Hey, group hug…..I love you guys!

Let the verbal assaults begin. I can take it.

Who else....

2009-04-29T21:58:00.001-04:00

Had a good ride today?

click click

2009-04-27T19:04:00.003-04:00

So, this past weekend had us driving to Athens and Winder for some more bike racing. Saturday was Ft Yargo for a pre-ride and post Xterra excitement. Mostly just me getting an Xterra race shirt which features a picture of yours truly on it. I hear they are going for $60 on ebay already so pick one up while the prices are still relatively low. Saturday night was a trip to Athens (where we stayed) to watch the Athens Twilight Crit. The crit was cool, same as usual - 'cept this time there wasn't quite as much beer and not near as much walking around. After little sleep, and a longer-than-expected commute, I was a little late getting to the race. I had about a five minute warmup and a sick stomach from stuffing down poptarts and muffins an hour earlier. Oh, and I had a frozen Jimmy Dean sausage biscuit also. Read about that little dietary secret in the Carmichael training systems book. Late to the line, absolutely and competely in last place on the start out of 26 finely tuned racing machines. Pick my way up into the top ten and have to fight off a late bloomer in the closing minutes of the race. I beat him, but he made me hurt. Nothing like reaching your MHR after 2.5 hours of racing and holding it there for 3-5 minutes. Well, no podium for me and Tally was calling my name. Me an the 'ol lady headed out before the white wave was over. We didn't get to see our boys finish, but we got the updates on the road. I hated leaving early, but it sure was nice to be home at 6:30 (they got back at 9:30). After half sleeping through work all day, I finally got a chance to see the results posted on the goneriding website. Not too bad. My lap times weren't consistent, but they consistently fell off as many others did. I am starting to recognize some of the names in my class and seeing how I beat them sometimes and they get me sometimes. Looks like everyone is picking up the pace since Macon, except for me. I am pretty sure my problem is the lack of rest leading up to the race and some very poor nutrition choices. With better planning and more rest, I really hope that I can serve it up to some my middle-of-the-packers at the next race. All in all, I am happy with it and very proud to be competing at this level. As for the others, well, BW looked to really be putting in a good fight on the first lap. I think his mind was writing fitness checks from Donald Trump's/Ryan Woodall's (depending on your own interpretation) account; unfortunately his legs and lungs were trying to cash them at his bank. He will have to recap the race, since I wasn't there. BJS dished on his blog about his race. Here is the recap of BJS's race - taken from the wonderful Big Jim Blog (since he refuses to write on here)..."Then there’s my race. No doubt I had become spoiled after winning the first two races in this series. I may have been a little overconfident (but I don’t think so). I knew I was in trouble during my warm-up. The legs felt really tired (not a good sign). I figured they would come around near the end of the warm-up but they never did. So I line up, Dave yells go and we’re off. I had a horrible start. In the woods about 5th place. I figure if I can just keep the leaders in sight that I’d be OK, but I just wasn’t feeling it on this day. I lost sight of a couple of the guys. Then, of course, I get mixed up with the slower guys in the classes that went off before me. I road clean, but again the legs just didn’t feel fast. When I crossed the line I had no idea where I placed. I was very disappointed in my race and my effort. When it was all said and done I got 3rd out of 19 guys. If this was a Florida series race I would have been very please, but considering this is GA where the competition if nothing like FL, I felt let down."

Just remember: fast is fun, slower is faster, it's all chicken but the bone, lips on my belly, good food and good times.

Look at me!

2009-04-23T08:43:00.003-04:00

The more things change the more they stay the same. I have to have the attention on me. Old schoolers will remember the BP gas station incident where Bobby D fell out. Then I had to have the paramedics look at me. In that same spirit, and because wrecking ball posted about his pain, I wanted to let you know that I am out as well. I unloaded a trailer this Monday and that's about the last thing I remember until last night. I re-injured my back and it's bad this time. I'm doing the pills, stretching and ice but it will take some time before I'm right. It will take even longer before I can trust it - like a running back planting for a cut after knee surgery. Let the BUMP waffling begin.

The PAB formerly known as Red Dragon

Gassed and sky rockets

2009-04-20T08:18:00.004-04:00

I'm amazed at the way I feel. I'm really tired. Leg tired, body tired. BUT I feel great. The race was less than an hour - about 59:30. Really don't feel like I was going any faster than any other time when I'm trying to go fast (aka trying to hang on our group rides). The Garmin showed an average heart rate of 174 so you know I was on the gas. My start sucked. I was behind the one guy on the front line that cheesed the start. I was near last and knocked off about five people before the first up in the field. Grabbed a few more before the rock turn and settled in about 3 or 4 behind Steve. Steve was about 4th or 5th place with the leaders in sight. Cool, back it down and just groove. Some strunz messed up the half pipe. Made the guy in front of me dab - which pretty much killed my mo. First sky rocket. I man it and slowly start to pull the leader group back. Up that first small switch back I see the leaders have a small gap on Steve's group. Steve tells me to come on and just try to keep it smooth. No problem. I pull some guys back and pass a few. Steve's just ahead. Up the rocky switchback, this guy dismounts but does no get out of the way. Second time that's happened to us. Guy in front of me flips out. I tell the dude to get out of the way and of course he does not so I have to get off. Sky rocket two. Lump it, I just run it. I keep seeing Steve and try to methodically pull him back. Not sure of the sequence because of dealing with my neck and most of it was a blur - but I see Steve right there - just ahead of me on the rocky step up. I got him. No. Dude in front of me dabs. I have to switch lines to the steep part on the left. Crap, I don't make it. Third sky rocket. Working my way back again, I catch a vine and stack it up. And another sky rocket. Somewhere in there I have fought my way through and I was only one guy behind Steve - maybe 30 yards. Just nut up and pull him back. Every time I tried, I either screwed up or somebody else screwed me up, and ahad more sky rockets. Pure suffering for me. Some time guys by and I just want to see the flat/road section. Then I know the bulk of the hard stuff is done. Finally make it. I cruise by the bikechain/180 tent and Mark tells me I'm doing great. Tells me I got a bogey and that I need to serve it up. Damn, it's porkchop (aka 234). He passes me as I'm grabbing water. I don't have much fight left but I'm going to do my best. By the time I get my bottle holstered, we dip into the singletrack. Porkchop attacks. He is hammering. I stay with him as long as possible. Just hold his wheel. Damn, I have to let him go. Don't sweat it. Just keep motoring. This stretch is long, flowing single track that leads up to the start/finish area. I've got it pegged through here. I'm chasing and being chased. My only regret of the race is losing two spots when we pop out into the field. I'm leading. I know their there. I pedal smooth and back it down, waiting for them to pass. I knew I was gassed so my only hope was to suck a wheel. Two guys come around fast. I'm able to grab the wheel but it hurts. My mind is telling me to skin that smoke wagon. But my legs are garbage. Come on PAB, one minute of riding. Stay on the wheel. I'm completely gassed. A few surges and I realize my goose is cooked. They drop me and I putter in - 13th.

Bad news - my neck was completely jacked - I have to work on that

Bad news - 6 minutes off the winner

Good news - Only 6 minutes off the winner - Macon was 12 +

Good news - Only a minute off porkchop - 4 + in in Macon

Good news - Only about 2 minutes off Steve - nearly 7 in Macon

I must be getting faster because y'all cant be getting any slower. See you at BUMP.

Red Dragon

On Terry - oh

2009-04-16T10:41:00.001-04:00

The first one does not have a countdown. It is planned and has an era of beginning, but no seconds to count. Instead, there is a lot of confirmation. At the bottom of the hill, right? Heads turning. Now? Are we going now? Bleep, bleep, bleep. Garmins are set and it is on-the-gas for three minutes. BW is anxious to BTP and takes an early lead, as expected. BJS, WB (cameo appearance) and myself settle into a similar rhythm just off the pace. With 15 seconds to go, we are all nuts to buts and about to head up a short little riser. I jockey for position and put the 18lb SS hardtail in first place coming out of turn four; so to speak.
The remainder of the intervals go somewhat similar, with different triumphs along the way. There was an explosion of power at the end of one of the two minute reps; an out-of-the-saddle full bore sprint - impressive. It was BW making sure he got his notch for the day. BJS won a couple, of course, complaining all the while that he “isn’t feeling it today”. The WB gave it an all out attempt; I mean all out. He attacked and put 75 yards on us, before BW decided that he wasn’t going to let that happen. Another one for BW, as he shut it down with 5 seconds remaining. The surprise appearance of the Mac stunned us all. I think it was the WB who was the most affected by his company though. It started going south immediately as the Mac shows up mid interval, and barks some orders to the WB as he passes by. The Mac, just sat in, did his work, made his deposits at the bank and just got a little bit faster. O, he also rode us all back to our trucks, so he could get in the extra miles. As for myself, I realized that 20mph on a single speed is hard to maintain. An interesting note though: Going north (against the head wind) down at the bottom by the lake, I was able to ride with the boys, and even beat them a couple times. Going south (nice tail wind) I was getting dropped because I didn’t have enough gear. There appeared to be about a 4mph difference, depending on which direction you went.
All in all, these things are getting fun. The first few interval days hurt; mentally and physically. They start to come around though, and really become fun – in a sick way. But, whatever you do, don’t start doing them now (if you race against me).

Good grief, frowning is the new smiling

2009-04-15T08:05:00.007-04:00

The sun had just set in more ways than one. I'd put on a performance in more ways than one. My body was completely shredded. I was embarrassed to be at this place. I was a John looking for pleasure. Except this was the good part of town and my fancy was a #1 combo. Double steakburger with cheese, add mustard relish. Hot and greasy it felt so good on my lips. As I stopped and started, going fast and then slow, I washed it down with syrup rich Coke and party ice. In between breaths I shoveled those crappy fries in just as pack fodder. I was toying with my burger, wanting to make it last. Just a little longer.

It was at this point that I realized I am the Street Bike Tommy of our group. I'm the sort of funny overweight guy that's not really good at anything. But I'll try (mostly) anything. People are happy to see me and they laugh at the jokes and antics. But when I'm flopping and flailing they just feel sorry for me.

Big Jim beat me like a drum last night. Tim couldn't believe I was really riding that slow. And the Mackerel just gave me the smirk. The smile that says I know that you know that I know I'm faster than you. The smile that says I'm going to talk your ear off when you try to drop me. Except it'll sound like Charlie Brown's teacher because you're breathing so hard. A smile you can't really see because your eyes are bugging out of your head.

I think it is time for the dragon to go away for awhile. A journey. So let it be known that I will be there Sunday for my ass shellacking. Then you will only see the Dragon when he wants to appear. Otherwise he shall be invisible.

Don't feel sorry for me.

Dragon

Pissed on my Sidis

2009-04-10T07:39:00.003-04:00

Did a road ride yesterday, I was on the bike for about 5 hours, hoping for a vision quest. All I did was piss on my Sidis. It was somewhere in the 3.5 hour mark, I had to piss so I go into the park bathroom and start. People who don't ride ask me, "doesn't that hurt your junk?" Never thought it did, but after yesterday, I think my junk found a way to revolt. Here is what happened.

Nuts: "Hey dickhole, when he pulls down those bib shorts and tries to piss, give me two streams."

Dickhole: "Are you sure, I feel fine."

Nuts: "You ain't the one reading FIZIK for three hours, stop being a bitch and give me two streams."

Dickhole: "Ok, here goes."

I look down from the "partial hunched over bib pissing position" and see a renegade stream killing my right Sidi. I redirect and finish, there is nothing I can do about it now. I fill up my bottles and head out for another two hours.

Conspiracy or just bad aim?

Riding inside and outside of myself

2009-04-10T06:44:00.003-04:00

Pull the KHS down. Flat tires, rusty cables. Even the front derail is stuck. GT-85 shower gets everything working OK. Air up the tires, center the rear brake and do a quick once over to make sure I'm not going to kill myself on this ride. Roll out and realize the seat is forward from the freedom springs tri last July 4. The HB tape is loose because I took off the aero bar. I just roll with because, after all, I am from Woodville. This bike rolls fast, steers fast and I wish it pedaled fast. I hate riding road bikes and this wasn't my first choice for tonight. But that's where everybody was riding so whatever.

Riding backwards to meet the group I try to keep it backed down but ride enough that these aren't trash miles. Try to remember that I need ten minutes of warm up. Everything is great except I need to do my neck exercises. My neck hurts and the position and stress of riding makes it hurt.

At the top of Garden View I see the 2 live crew on their 20 minute training interval. They yell "see you in a little while" but I never did. Feeling pretty good so I decide to climb AJ Henry. A big concern here because last time out my legs were full, a repeat of the Macon race. That last ride was Tuesday night and I pretty much suffered the entire ride. I took a leap of faith this climb would not put me over the edge. At the top of the climb I got hung out to dry because the Joe's ride passed by me on the last turn. It's a blind corner so I had no warning they were coming. I was able to turn around quickly enough and the worm was there. So was the mac and some of the other boys. The worm and I pulled through about half of the group down the hill I just climbed. We didn't lay the hammer but we got a little speed. Up Garden View and I'm still OK. Turn the corner at the church and it starts to heat up. Chris tells me to grab Tim's wheel. Sounds like he's directing Steve a little ways back. I grab Tim's wheel but he pulls through a group. I think Rita is there. Tim has pegged it pretty hard. Some tall dude is just off the right but rolling good. I give him verbal cue to get on - the type of sound you make to make a horse a giddy up. He must of heard because he immediately grabbed the wheel. I tuck in behind him. I'm about 5th place. Not really where I want to be. Tonight I'm supposed to sit in. I know the leaders will pull off and I will have to pull trhough. History says that I will make a few little climbs and then blow up. So I do something different. I actually pull to the side and float around to see if I can survive. I see Tim pull off to the left and the group surges. The ride is all over the place. We're about 10 back, in a cluster of folks side by side. The worm pulls through and over to give me a wheel. Up the last hill the group has leaned out. We're all single file now. Chris looks back to see if I'm there. I'm still on. We're about 7 or 8 back. Will I really make it? Mid way down sprint alley, the pace gets pushed harder when Berg and I think Zak come around on the double yellow. I could care less because I'm in pain and just glad to be here. Chris checks a few more times. We float to the right but make it all the way to the sprint. Feels good. I look around for Steve but he's way off (I think he took a piss).

Can't decide what to do. Do I go back for Steve or try to survive the switch back? Sorry Steve but I have to try and stay on. I ride with the group and Berg gives me motivation for the climb. It hurts and I'm a little off the back. I make a little time up down the chicane and we get back on at the 4 way stop. Up Lt. Dan's hill I just want to survive. I sit through the first up and then see Steve! No way. I've never seen that before. Big worm and wrecking ball have pulled Steve back from the dead. All of them are breathing hard but their there. WOW.

Secon lap, in arbor hills I decide to move to the front. I want to bomb the downhill. Do so easily out front by myself. This gives me a little head start for Garden View which really, really hurts. Worm asks me to pull back Terry's wheel when we get on Shamrock. I think I'm doing a good job of slowly pulling us back. Trying to not gas us - but get us up there. Not quick enough because Chris comes around and says ride the train. Just ask for another gear next time big worm - glad to do it. We're back on and it gets lit up again past the church. Brendan is pulling. Tim's out front too. This time it's a little more spastic. The first couple of ups and downs hurt. I'm in better position but behind white jersey who keeps yoyoing. Steve's there and I hear the worm barking direction. White jersey and I are off to the right. One of the guys were tracking pulls over and white jersey falters a little. I'm looking for a place to get back on. Off to the left and a little back is Steve and company. Not sure where Terry is. I'm going to have to pull through by myself. At the top of the last tittie. We're about 5 wide and some guy in the draft trys to stomp on it- his drive train takes a nasty puke and scares the shit out of everybody . We all scatter around and it's fuzzy but I think I hear worm still barking to grab a wheel. I ride through and go for it as far as possible. Don't quite make it but I don't blow up and I'm able to grab Rita's wheel to mostly make it with the group.

We go through the motions and the switch back HURTS. Terry and Steve scream up it. Then on to Dan's hill, I suffer. That SUCKED, but I made it. Say later to the worm and roll home. Feel pretty good. Now I'm glad i didn't bail on the ride. I owe it all to race director worm. I'm so tired.

Dragon

(Almost) Dead Rabbits

2009-04-09T07:27:00.003-04:00

The Dead Rabbits was a gang in New York City in the 1850s originally part of the Roach Guards. The name has a second meaning rooted in Irish American vernacular of NYC in 1857. The word "Rabbit" is the phonetic corruption of the Irish word ráibéad, meaning "man to be feared". "Dead" was a slang intensifier meaning "very". Thus, a "Dead Ráibéad" means a man to be greatly feared.

So I'm driving to work and dreaming about snickers eggs and peeps. Out of nowhere I see this group of bunnies scattering at the sound of my engine and glare of headlights. Momma said never to swerve because she's seen a lot of people in ERs that swerved for any number of animals.

So I stayed the course but I did tap the brakes when one of the bunnies looked over his shoulder with a WTF cartoon face.

Something about the look said "not on Easter buddy." Most of them made it to the side of the road but one of them checked down with some redirection. As I passed over him I cringed and waited for the bump - the tell-tale sign of road kill. In a flash I was clear, no bump - no kill. Some would take this post as sign of sleep deprivation. I just say it's a sign that things work out. I hope I see all of the gang at BC this weekend.

Red Dragon

Tuesday night rides are the highway to the danger zone

2009-04-08T06:54:00.004-04:00

Goose: Yeeha, Jester's dead! Wolfman: Won this bullshit? Goose: Didn't everybody? Hollywood: Hell no, man. We got our butts kicked. Wolfman: Thirty seconds. We went like this, he went like that. I said to Hollywood, "Where'd he go?" Hollywood says, "Where'd who go?" Hollywood: Yeah, and he's laughing at us, right on the radio, he's laughing at us. Slider: That was me laughing, dickhead.

New jersey / shorts order - color choices

2009-04-03T10:48:00.002-04:00

Okay, so some of you want to change up colors and some don't. On the next order, do you want to change the orange to green? Or white? those are the only two options. Let me know which you prefer by email, or this blog. The order will be placed next Friday and I will need payment upfront - via paypal or cash. Paypal will cost you an extra 5%. I am paying for this with my on CC so I am not planning to cover this order like bikechain did. Let me know what color you like best.....

WTF! Get the picture?

2009-04-02T09:48:00.003-04:00

Fried twisted knees with all the water you can drink

2009-04-01T08:37:00.017-04:00

I turned to reach for my bike and pull it off the ceiling. Awkward position and sharp pain means I have done some sort of damage. I've twisted it and it hurts a little. No biggie, should be able to walk it off. I just got off the phone with Tim and we've committed to riding. We know it's gonna rain, just don't know how hard or when. We meet up at bikechain and ride backwards towards the blairstone overpass. I feel good and we're just chilling. No need to over do it. We pull up to the parking lot and see Tyler, little ball, iceberg and big worm. I notice only Chris' truck so I know everyone else rode here. Don't see Steve. I suspect that he has bailed. The worm confirms and says that Steve is actually smart. His opinion reinforced by a couple of good gusts of rain. We're under the overpass so we're dry for now. The worm is slowly assembling his kit and readying his new rig we've either called Frosty, Wendy or Tatiana. This is slow for Chris so I know he is waiting to see how the rain shakes out. A slight break in the rain and we're on the bikes. The worm leads out pretty fast. I try not to stomp on it and gradually reel him in. Does not work. I have to ride pretty hard to catch up. Interval # 1. We ride on Goose Pond from Weems and no one wants to ride into Tom Brown. It's pretty chill until we dip down into the woods and climb the first hill on Cadillac. Zak leads it out with Tyler following. Quick up and good pace through the ups and downs. I ratchet it back to breathe and spy Tyler and Zak doing the North Shore section. I decide to ride even. I come around the sweeper and see Tyler crossing the cutoff. I punch it. I reel him in to about two bike lengths. He is hammering everything. He must be trying to pull Zak back. Hammer, Hammer, hammer. We get to the top of roller coaster and I realize Tyler left Zak back at North Shore where he slipped. Meanwhile, I am gassed from chasing Tyler. Interval # 2. We head out on the lower section past the bathrooms. Zak is riding pretty smooth but he keeps inching up the pace. I go with him until I realize I have to ride back to BC. I wave the next guy around and it's Tyler - I forgot to mention he's on rigid SS. I decide to ride my own pace and the rest of the group catches me. I hear Chris waxing poetic about the benefits of a bigger tire. We finally make it to the end and I'm done. We meet up with Jason O. I'm ready to head out but someone says bucket loop. I reluctantly decide I need the miles so I take off. Ride an even pace. The rain has helped the dyke section. It's really smooth. Over the tracks and up the clay wall. Jason O is sweating my back wheel so we take off. I decide I need to see what I can do. So I gradually build the pace. Just trying to ride smooth. My Achilles heel is that last climb to the fields so I save a little. When I get there I punch it. I can here someone back there but the sound is getting more faint. I push through the field and bomb the downhill. Pass the bucket, then break out of the woods. I finally look back to see who's there - nobody. Interval # 3. Down the wall and over the tracks. Jason O pulls up and we talk about his race - first place at the RBC. That effort hurt me so we just relax on the dyke. Up the climb to the trail and I'm gassed. I get dropped. We re-group at the drop and talk about how nobody is going to ride the drop. We take off on the upper section to return. Tim, Berg and Zak have checked out. I'm last following the worm who is sweating J's wheel. We're hauling ass. J blows a corner and Chris and I go around. The worm stomps on the gas and I have to dig in to hold on. He is flying. We come around one section and see a nasty skid where one of our guys blew a corner. Hammer, hammer, hammer. Near the end now and Chris goes to switch lanes so he can rail the big berm. Did not expect that. I correct my line just in time to see the worm drifting. He rides it down trying to hold on and ride it out. He does not make it and crashes clipped in. Interval # 4. I go around but shut her down. Chris pulls himself up and we roll on. J's right there behind us. We bog out. Jason bails up Piney Z to his house. We head back in. Chris and Co. go up the trail. Tim and I take the double. Chris comes out of nowhere through the woods. Berg and Zak are gone. Our trio ride the double in with Chris continuing to push. I'm done but still there. The last up crushes me as I see Chris sprinting out of the saddle with Tim powering behind. I'm done. Limp in to see everybody at the bike wash. Tyler's there too so I guess he teamed up with Berg and Ball. Rinse the bike. Chris bails out at the sound of thunder. Tim and I leave shortly thereafter. By the time we reach weems, huge gusts of winds have rolled in with stinging drops of rain. Hurts bad enough that I think it's hail. Buckets come down and we later describe it as like a white-out. Tim and I can't see where we are going and decide to take the Heavenly Hams cut thru. More rain, more wind and big thunder boomers. I can only think get to the shop. We finally make it to the shop through blankets of rain. Words don't describe the volume of water. You had to be there.

I'm fried. Red Dragon